BIKSS and I are in our 50s. We met in 1988 but it took us 24 years before hooking up in 2012. We moved into a DD/lg dynamic a year later. In April 2015 some shit hit the fan. We took some time off but eventually found a new us.
I used to live alone except for a few shifting years when my folks moved in then out, then after dad passed on, mum moved in again. Now that she too has passed, it's just me, one carer whom I've decided to keep on, and my tenant.
He lives with his family. This is us.
I had lessons today cos the mum of a pair of sisters didn't mind letting them come for class. It's school hols now over here, so they haven't been in school for about 2 weeks, at this point.
This is good news. At least I can continue to get paid!
My pink skirt has also arrived. It's so "girly" and sweet. I like it A LOT! I'm not sure just HOW I'm going to be able to pull it off, seeing as how in my regular life I'm not what anyone might describe as 'sweet'. Still, it might be a refreshing change. (I don't see this colour on the US site, but there is a lovely purply one which wasn't available on my local site. Pfft. - P/S. Free shipping available now!)
It's a LITTLE bit see thru so I'll definitely have to be careful with my choice of underwear... or maybe wear a longish top.
And I'm pretty knackered today, after tossing and turning from the heat last night as I was trying to get to sleep. And running the clinic solo this morning. Pffft.
So I'm just going to leave you with this Youtube video from Dr Youn and head off to bed. Not passing GO, not collecting $200.
I've been thinking about this recently. About how everything in life is about balance.
I eat healthy and exercise regularly to balance out the oxidative stress (from, well, stress and smoking among other things).
I spend close to nothing on mani-pedis and hair, so that I can afford my monthly massage (which is way more important to me cos without it I start aching like mad!).
Food rescue provides a large portion of my meals, so I can afford to get a catering service twice a week with regular "home-cooked" style meals too. On the one hand it's a bit more expensive but it means I don't have to worry about procuring food from the shops. But just in case, I order frozen veggies and mushrooms in 1kg bags for emergencies. Again this means it's cheaper than running off to the shops and getting them fresh. Not to mention it saves time. Plus I might not be able to get the vegetables I want. (And I also want to support the guy who runs the catering service cos he's a small one man show too!)
(these days this is how we get our food!)
I enjoy shopping and having new clothes / shoes (LOL, as you all know) but with the discount apps and online sources I can still treat myself regularly without spending too much money ($5 for a full-length skirt what???)
I don't want to contribute to too much to waste, so I've found lots of avenues for donating old stuff - from household items to clothes to yes, even food that we don't/can't finish.
I want to study and learn stuff, and I use my online screen time for that, as well as blogging and necessities like paying bills or renewing permits and insurance policies. But at the same time I also want to just relax and chill out with TV shows and movies. So I often think about balancing play time with work time on the computer too.
Before the pandemic there was the balancing of my social (and work) life. Time with the folks (now just mum), vs time with BIKSS, vs time with my own friends - and also time to myself (including chill out and exercise time). Work is pretty fixed so it's not like I can change that too much. Altho I do have a say in whether I want to sign up for another course (which counts as work, I suppose) and how much time I want to dedicate to that.
These days I don't have to think of that many aspects. I'm mostly stuck at home because of the pandemic. I go to work cos that's fixed hours. Piano is a touch and go thing, it kinda depends on restrictions and whether the kids and their parents feel comfortable coming to class. Or whether *I* do.
But with BIKSS, since we can't eat out anymore, these days it's more of "Do we go exercise tog?" vs sneaking into the room and getting some sexy-time!
What about you? Do you ever think about how you balance things in your life?
That derm course I started on Coursera turned out to be undoable. I didn't understand a thing she was saying. Her accent was awful. The words were unclear. The way the information was presented was jumbled. I gave up.
So now I'm looking at some other stuff back on EdX. It's a course on Lifestyle Medicine. The only thing is a lot of the lectures are only available to paid learners. And to do the whole course, it would cost me about $850. This is money I don't have. Well, ok, that's not true. I could afford it if I really, really wanted to. But I don't know if it's something I really, really want to do. Altho I'm kinda leaning towards Yes.
I do need to think about my income tho...
One of my students just flunked his first semester in high school so the mum rang today in a panic saying she's going to have him stop piano for a bit just until he gets his act together. In my experience, these sorts of cases NEVER come back. Perhaps 1 in 20. A lot of them get lazy (I would too) and stop practising during the hiatus, and when they DO think about coming back, it's very a stressful and tedious endeavour to start practising again and so they decide to quit for good.
To make things worse, the pandemic is proving very de-motivational since face-to-face exams are non-existent. A lot of kids enjoy "levelling up" yearly, so to speak. And when the usual format is changed to this current version of a video-submission type entry, well, let's just say most kids aren't keen, from what I've seen.
So while I don't think I want to pay close to a grand right now for another program, it would be terribly interesting and right up my alley.
Anyway, in the meantime, a good friend (more of a mentor, especially when I was a bit younger and dealing with the father's dementia as a newbie to this whole ageing lark) asked me about supplements / health / skincare etc. And she knows I did a course a couple years ago on this whole nutrition and disease thing.
She also knows I do a lot of my own research on skincare (heh, I'm sure you remember some of my skincare posts... click those links or use the "skincare" tag on the right 👉) and so I thought I'd go look up some resources online I could send her.
I found this awesome set of articles on the Paula's Choice website. While the products are pretty pricey, and I don't get them easily here so shipping will be a real pain in the ass, the information on there is free, so I thought I'd share the links with her. And with you.
If you're interested in other topics, like acne or specific concerns like rosacea etc, look around the site for relevant articles. But here's the page I like best - Anti-Aging. 😹 It's a sort of summary page, but if you scroll to the bottom there are links to articles on all sorts of stuff, including acne and aging, sunscreens, make-up, and specific anti-aging ingredients.
And what skincare am I currently looking at? I'm enjoying the Advanced Clinicals range from iHerb. It's a house brand, developed in a lab in Chicago. And very affordable. Plus they're cruelty free and DO NOT SELL IN CHINA where product testing is sometimes required. I've seen some pretty good reviews too, but I haven't tried everything of course. I do know that their mist toners and retinol night cream (sadly, discontinued) are pretty awesome. They have replaced it with another type of retinol cream which I've purchased but haven't opened as I still have a little bit of the old one left, AND I'm currently still only halfway through the stuff I picked up during my K-Beauty spree. I have a ton of essences and serums so I won't be getting the A/Clinicals ones yet. While I don't love all the K-Beauty Some of them I definitely WILL repurchase:
I did say I wanted to get a tub of Beauty of Joseon cleansing balm... to replace the Klair's cleansing oil... but that whole dip-a-finger-in-the-tub-or-have-to-bother-with-a-spatula-in-the-shower business is a bit off-putting. And it's pretty expensive.
So, we'll see.
Let me know. What do you think about the Lifestyle Medicine course thing? And what are some of your favourite skincare brands / products?
My pink skirt has arrived. I love it. I just don't know when I can wear it, now that we're in the middle of this darn 2nd lockdown. It's in the wash at the moment. But I'll show it to you as soon as it's laundered.
Because one should ALWAYS wash new clothing before wearing them.
That's all from me. I'm going to binge-watch Victoria. I love it. I managed a few episodes over the week but it's now FRIDAY and I have nothing else to do this weekend so guess what I'm going to be up to. Yup. No baking, no lessons, just episode after episode of Jenna Coleman. Looking forward to a weekend of slothing.
Two nights ago I traipsed down to a popular convenience store where the food rescue group admin had previously made an arrangement with them to separate their cold foods when throwing out the unsold food for the day.
I don't usually do the pick ups, but seeing as Wednesday was a holiday, I offered to help the regular lady collect the stuff.
It typically happens around 1am, as that's when they clear the fridges, and also, it's kinda against their policy so the dude who is doing this is cautious about not doing this at a time when there are still people milling about.
I scored some spaghetti, clam soup, beef sukiyaki, beef brisket, grilled chicken with gravy, mash potatoes and hamburger patty, and of course burgers and sandwiches.
All this is going to be really helpful now that piano lessons have come to a standstill (again!) and having a variety of food also means MAYBE the mother will be tempted to try some new stuff, meaning she has to actually eat it and put some food in her belly!
I also picked up a kilo of frozen okra from another person in the rescue group, and since it's mango season I decided to do a chilli sambal fry up with mango cubes.
"Sambal is a chili sauce or paste, typically made from a mixture of a variety of chili peppers with secondary ingredients such as shrimp paste, garlic, ginger, shallot, scallion, palm sugar, and lime juice."
The sambals that have lime juice, vinegar, or any other tangy liquid are typically used as dipping sauces, but the ones used for cooking tend to be just a blend of chilli, onions, garlic, ginger and/or other spices / condiments.
Think of it as a chilli-based paste.
Anyway, the mother used to enjoy sambal dishes, but recently she's found that chilli in anything is too spicy. So I made this version with a sambal - ketchup mix. Turns out she managed to put down 7 pieces of mango and 7 pieces of okra. That's something!
Another thing I've done recently is mixed in some of her instant oat drink with eggs. This gives it a slightly sweeter edge and would probably work better as a breakfast food than a lunch or dinner option.
What's in it -
1/4 cup oat drink (already sweet out of the packet)
1 bowl egg whites (leftovers from ramped up Lapis baking)
1 whole egg (cos a bit of yolk is always good)
2 tspn coconut flour (which I'm trying to use up)
Butter for frying
Sprinkle with sugared cinnamon (for some extra oomph)
The only good about mother's zero-appetite problem is that I'm getting to try lots of new recipes!
The mother is not eating well. She isn't eating much. She probably wouldn't eat at all if I didn't stand beside her and shovel food into her mouth.
The sister bought some Penang Laksa (aka Assam Laksa) and Penang style Fried 'Kway Teow' (rice noodles) - both dishes are known to have very strong flavour profiles and the mother had a fondness for these in the past.
(Penang Laksa or Assam Laksa)
"Penang Laksa (Malay: Laksa Pulau Pinang), also known as Asam Laksa, a speciality of the Malaysian island of Penang. The soup is made with mackerel and its main distinguishing feature is the asam or tamarind which gives the soup a sour and appetizing taste. The fish is poached and then flaked. Other ingredients that give Penang Laksa its distinctive flavour include mint, pineapple slices and otak udang. (a black coloured shrimp paste produced by boiling down the slurry of leftovers from shrimp processing and then adding molasses to it). It is listed at number 7th on the "World's 50 best foods" compiled by CNN Go in July 2011."
And now I have to show that shrimp paste to you cos what sort of person tells you about something new and then doesn't explain it right?
So it's REALLY thick. If it's been in the fridge it comes out really hard, and a lot of hot water is called for to melt it back down. Here's a site that gives you a recipe, so you might have a slight idea of what it tastes like - How to Make Petis Udang / Hae Ko.
And I found this video where you can see the consistency of the Hae Ko / Shrimp paste - it's somewhere around the 20-second mark.
"Char Kuey Teow is basically flat rice noodles stir-fried with shrimp, bloody cockles, Chinese lap cheong (sausage), eggs, bean sprouts, and chives in a mix of soy sauce.
A great serving of Char Kuey Teow is flavored not only with the freshest ingredients, but equally important is the elusive charred aroma from stir-frying the noodles over very high heat in a well-seasoned Chinese wok."
And the mother? She didn't like 'em. She didn't want 'em. Ah well.
The brother brought some rusks that she can soften in her milk tea or Ovaltine. This is something we used to do at the corner Indian coffee shops when we were young (Teh Tarik aka pulled milk tea OMG).
(Pic from www.bonappetit.com)
He thought it might rekindle some kind of nostalgia-induced appetite. Nope. She ate one on the day he brought it over when he came to visit. And the rest of the pack is still sitting untouched on the counter.
I've taken to looking up recipes for old-fashioned local desserts. The ingredients can still be bought, it's just no one really sells these in the shops anymore as they're pretty easy and cheap to make, but in order to make a decent profit (to cover rent and other fixed costs) a restaurateur would have to sell them at 5-6 times the price of what it takes to make 'em. Either that or they'd have to sell about 40 bowls a day.
Anyway whatever the reason they don't sell them anymore, I went and made some old-style desserts in the hopes of getting the mum to eat! I figure the more different types of food she gets, the more likely she is to eat some of it at least.
This is "bubur terigu" with sweet potato cubes, sweetened with palm sugar and cooked with coconut milk.
According to this page - it is known as White Wheat Sweet Porridge in English. Think gooey starchy oats / barley -type grain in a sweet coconut cream gravy.
She ate 3 spoons of it. Not bad I suppose.
I also made Sago Pudding today. Using small pearls, I cooked them, ran them under tap water after cooking to drain off excess starchy goo, then put them in little ramekins to chill and set.
2 hours later it's ready to eat. After it's been in the fridge for a couple of hours, run a knife along the side of the cup/ bowl, then tip the whole thing out. Drizzle with coconut milk and palm sugar. There are a million how-tos on Youtube. They're all pretty much the same. The difficult part is getting the sago to set. And the key to THAT is cooking it correctly in the first place. Sago is chewy but tasteless. So top it off with honey, whip, ice cream, or anything that's sweet!
COOK YOUR SAGO RIGHT!
Today's dessert. My ramekin is about 2 inches in diameter. Mum ate half. It's not much, but I'm thankful for whatever I can get her to eat.
And now, I'm late for an appointment to rescue some okra.
2. This is a screen grab... so the "play" arrow doesn't work.
But those chicken breasts sure don't look like breast meat.
3. I'm glad it says follow and not TOUCH women.
4. And finally, this one is so true. The words are a bit small... but still readable.
It's a pretty small collection today. But I have a bonus pic of BIKSS wearing his Shein panda tee. He wore it on our walk today, just so I could see him in it. I think he's looking pretty good these days, what with the diet and everything. I'm pretty proud of him for sticking with it! Yay Daddy!
That's it from me. Let me know if you had a favourite from today's smaller selection.
Our numbers are creeping back up. The restrictions have been tightened. Since about 10 days ago. People are not supposed to be out in groups of more than 2. Unless you're from the same household, in which case, sure. (Dining out has been cancelled for a month! And gyms and all other lessons involving mask-off activities like exercise classes, wind instrument classes and performances etc. have been cancelled. People are back to working from home. Schools have shut, moving the kids to e-learning. Again.)
Also, mask wearing is mandatory. Still.
We've been stepping up efforts to trace and swab and prevent further spread.
Two malls have been closed - for two weeks, as there is a cluster stemming from that area (the malls are adjoining so they've decided to consider that one entity).
There are a number of cases in two apartment buildings as well, so all residents living in the buildings are getting swabbed. I saw some pics of it in the news. Looks like a crime scene. "Special ops" signs are everywhere cos they've set up swabbing teams in the vicinity of the apartment buildings.
In the first one they found 10 positive cases in 4 households, and in the second it was 4 cases in 2 households. But because there are lots of common areas such as lifts and landings and corridors, it could spread very quickly. (The news reported that they'll be testing all 243 residents in that second building.)
They've put the sick dudes in hospital and family members have all been shipped off to quarantine facilities. The buildings have also been given the royal treatment in terms of disinfection.
It really looked like something out of a zombie movie, or some apocalyptic film. Sigh.
But despite all the government's best efforts I fear we're not seeing as much improvement as we hope cos there are still Covidiots around! As I was coming home today I saw a bunch of fellas sitting below my building with bicycles parked nearby. I saw 3, but my view was obstructed so there could have been more - I saw 4 bikes - and they were happily chit chatting without their masks.
I don't often report things but I just couldn't stand it. The minute I reached my apartment I was on the phone with the nearby police station.
This mandatory mask wearing and the rule of 2 come under some special temporary law thing, I'm not sure what it's called, but they've made it very clear that it's prosecutable.
I'm sorry guys, I mean, I've seen some old people walking about with masks not quite properly worn, or two uncles at the park sitting on different benches and having a conversation 5 feet away from each other, but I don't call the cops on them cos, well, they're either very distanced from others or they're walking (and transient contact isn't as risky). AND THEY ARE OLD and a lot of old fogies here don't quite speak English cos they're mainly Chinese educated. It wasn't till some years after WW2 that we made English our first language in schools. So sure, I get it. Maybe they're not so sure what the actual rules are. But since everyone says wear a mask, ok, they wear a mask.
But these fellas were maybe early 20s? And they totally should know better. More than 2. No mask. It's very cut and dried.
Tsk. I don't want MY building to be a "special ops" picture in the news!
Years ago I had a skirt similar to this one. The lace inserts between the "layers" eventually died and I never got round to replacing it. Until now. This is pre-wash and as you can see, very wrinkly.
Post-wash, the wrinkles have eased up somewhat and this will probably be how I wear it... I don't dislike ironing, but if it's just one or two pieces, it's too much hassle to drag the ironing board out. I also realised that the first section is pretty snug and hugs my bum. LOL. I quite like that it does this while still technically being a flare skirt. I like the fabric and the fit on this so much that I went ahead and got a very light pink version. For $5. Cos #points and free shipping.
I also picked up a floral one which is looser around the hip and thigh, as this one only has the one ruffled layer. This is me in it. With the skirt reaching down to my ankles. The fabric doesn't feel as cottony as the solid black one, but it still swishes prettily and has a "slick" slippery feel to it.
Here is what it looks like on their website - it's obvious that the model is way way taller than my 5-foot-5-inches. I'm actually pretty happy that it's as long as it is on me cos anything that stops at mid-calf ends up making my large-ish calves look extra chunky.
The other thing that I've done recently is worn a scarf clip on my blouse as an ornament. I don't do necklaces anymore so why not right?
The channel is called Fabulous50s and she posts these feel-good, be positive, live your best life type fashion, workout, makeup and general living-as-an-older-person videos, but mostly I use her channel for workouts cos she has tons of indoor walking workouts for over-50s. And since I'm almost there, and am beginning to have aches pains and other ligament-related issues, I figure I may as well get started now.
If you wanna save time and skip the video, here's a pic of the before and after.
Anyway, I got to thinking, I totally should repurpose my brooches and scarf clippy things (hence the experimentation with that scarf clip on my collar). I don't own a pearl necklace shortener (YET!) but I tried this trick with a large enough brooch (with a long enough pin) on a plain tank top and it totally worked.
The only reason I ordered a shortener anyway is that for the pin to be long enough to hold in all the fabric of the tank strap, the brooch has gotta be pretty large in the first place. And I think a simple, low-key, understated ring might be more appropriate for the workplace, or when applying this trick to a printed top.
Here's a how-to video featuring the use of a necklace shortener
How to Use a Necklace Shortener
OK, so if tanks are not your thing, don't fret. Here's another scarf clip tip - how about using a center-bar scarf clip on the side of your tee instead of knotting it? I always find that a good strong knot requires WAY too much fabric. I mean, I can spare SOME cloth, but not enough for a whole knot! This looks like a fabulous way to get that side-knot look without over-stretching the bottom of your tee.
(Pearl center-bar O design scarf ring)
(Oval center-bar scarf ring)
There's are entries on Amazon that actually say T Shirt Clips in addition to scarf clip in the item description. Here's one example -
(Hysagtek T-shirt Clips Plastic Scarf Clips Ring for Women)
And they come in different shapes and colours and materials -
...And this can be my P post. (See yesterday's entry...) LOL.
I've often wondered if I'm the only one who saw a change in my poop habits pre-period. I've mentioned this to other GPs before, when I was much younger. And each time I've been told there's no correlation.
Well, here's the correlation, eejits (the doctors, I mean, not you readers). Tsk. I knew it was linked SOMEhow.
You can blame prostaglandins and progesterone. One helps you push things out and the other wants to hold on to all those nutrients in case you have to feed a mini human in your tummy.
The article recommends some remedies... so if you have a problem with pre-period no-show-poo or if you have a bad case of diarrhoea (OMG have you not seen PREFECTDT's post featuring the funniest English-learning video on earth?) click the link and have a read. It's easy to understand and may make a lot of sense like it did for me.
(I feel like this should be an A-Z challenge M post. Maybe next year for my A-Z I'll just repost relevant OLD posts.)
Right. I bought more shoes.. didn't need them, but totally wanted them. I just love the black loafer mules so much (Yes I know I have the leopard mules but they're not the same material/cut/fit!) that I went and got these too-
I never realised my skin was so PINK! It matches the shoes quite well, surprisingly. They tell you on all the fashion channels to get shoes that match your skin tone. I always thot that meant tan or some kind of dark beige... who knew pink would work too!?! BIKSS picked the colour so I really must thank him!
I'll save the black ones for dark outfits or denim+black combos, and wear the pink ones on classier (but semi-casual-ish) evenings out.
This one has a cloth upper - I'm hoping it'll last longer than the pleather ones. I'm planning on these giving off a sophisticated daytime casual vibe. And the leopard ones are currently my fun, 'character' pair. Yes my shoes have personalities.. and if I didn't have that many I'd totally name them!
But excited as I was to get these, when the parcels arrived I let them sit and wait on the floor by the bed cos I was in the midst of doing something else - sorting out the tiles of one of (yes we have a few) our mahjong sets. (I have one, mum brought two more.) We're planning on giving this one away so I was just checking to make sure that everything was there, no missing tiles.
I got so much satisfaction out of doing that, that I went and grabbed the other set that arrived from mum's old place and did the same thing, just to be sure that it was a complete set too. We haven't used it in decades, so I wanted to be sure I wasn't giving away a perfectly good set only to discover that the one we chose to keep was wonky.
My own set is definitely not missing any tiles cos I was there when we last played with it. But now I'm tempted to get in there and arrange the tiles in that one 👧. It's so therapeutic!
In any case, let me know your thoughts on those shoes and / or mahjong.
