Procrastinating

Did I mention I'm actually a huge procrastinator? Until something hits me on the side of my head and I start storming about the place (or internet) getting things sorted all at once? And then that tires me out. But that's how I get things done. It's a good thing my BP is consistently low. Or else I'm pretty certain I'd have gotten a stroke by now. 

But where was I? Yes. I'm suppose to get to a toy review. I've played with it. Taken the pictures. Assembled my thoughts. But nope. You're not getting the review of the toy. Instead you're getting a video clip of the latest thing I'm watching - POLDARK. 

It's a series that has ended. No more. Done. Finito. But I'm only now watching it, so here is the trailer and some clips from it / about it. 

Enjoy. (As always, videos have been embedded but if it doesn't work for you I've linked the youtube urls in the text.)

The official trailer ~

A summary of the leads' love story... *spoilers* ~

The sexy stocking scene ~ 

(where I find myself screaming two things - is that the best kiss you can muster? and also, you'll ruin the stocking... take it off!)

OK. Go watch it. It's riveting. I watched the whole of the first season on Saturday. And half the second season on Sunday. 

And then I had to go to bed, pah! 

I just wish they would kiss more convincingly. (Think Outlander / Bridgerton... woohoo!)

And instead of a mood pic today, I thought I might share a week's worth of outfits I'm wearing. You know, just to continue on with the Fashion Contrast theme! (And because I don't do Instagram LOL.)

This was Monday's High Value / Low Colour contrast outfit - you'll soon realise I carry the same bag and wear the same shoes to work everyday, so just ignore those items should they come into view. 

Both top and bottom are from Shein. Pants are part of a two-piece matchy-matchy set. I'm totally giving myself permission to turn loungewear into workwear! 

These are the pieces as shown on their website - 

TOP - Lettuce Trim Ribbed Mock Neck Tee in a size L 

BOTTOM -  part of an All Over Print Twist-front Sweatshirt & Sweatpants set in a size S

(You really gotta check the measurements shown on the individual pieces when buying from these online sites.)

PS. Notice the A to Z 2021 square over there on the right? Up top? Yup that one. 

Go ahead... Click on it. 

I'm taking part in this year's Blogging from A to Z Challenge. Come join me!

Old Friends and New

As I was reading through some of my old posts and comments, reminiscing, I suppose, I came across a comment that June (of Ward & June) left one one of my posts, Secretes of the Sub Sisterhood mentioning that she had added the link to her favourite posts page on her own blog. 

If you've read there before you might have seen it already. But for some reason I only saw it for the first time today. 

So if you're interested in what some of their favourite posts were around blogland, have a look at THIS PAGE which contains a short description and links to the actual posts. Mind you this was a long time ago, in blogland terms anyway, so some of the links might not take you anywhere at all. But it's worth checking out, especially if you're new to DD / Ds / TTWD etc. 

And I just wanted to take the time to say how much I appreciate my early blogging friends, Conina, Kitty, Faerie, who were the first few to reach out and say "you're not alone and you're not weird"... 

Also, Emen, Bas, Jake, Spanky (and the CWS members) , Del Fonte, Geekie Kitty, Master's Piece, Aisha, Renee Rose, SNP, Ami, Dragon's Rose, and slightly more recently, Lil, Pygar & Abby (I do miss you). 

I'm sure there are more but it would take too long to go thru all my comments and list them all! Because yes, I have forgotten some of the names, but I will never forget that they all (like you) made me feel welcome at a time when I really needed to find some people who were like me. They uplifted, supported, encouraged, challenged, and celebrated me and each other. And I am so glad that the same spirit continues on in blogland today, even tho' individual bloggers may come and go. 

(Some of you are still here  - or I've recently found you again *looks at Bleue and DV* - so I shan't add you to that list! LOL)

Thank you for being my people!

My mood pic today ~

Not Just Clothes on Shein and All Sorts of Pain + a PS

Two totally unrelated topics, I know. But I just had to tell you this. 

Last Friday when I was in bed with a sore foot, I actually was quite naughty asking BIKSS if he had given any thought as to how we could have sex despite the inconvenience! LOL. He said no, but I admitted that I was thinking about it. Haha. The sex was good sex, with a round two blowjob after. But the thing that made it super hot that night was that we played with our crop, on my boobs, on my thighs, on my pussy (WITH undies on).. and then because it was a bit noisy we went and got the cane instead. On my boobs, on my thighs, on my pussy (still with undies on)...  and then he used it on my face... just a tap, enough to sting but no serious lashings. I loved it. Can I just say (again) I really love the cane? 

And we talked a bit about him inflicting pain. In the past he always maintained that he only enjoyed it because he could see how much I  enjoyed receiving the pain. But then pain in itself doesn't turn me on. It's submitting to his pain that does. But if he doesn't want to inflict said pain, then am I submitting to something he wants in the first place? And by the same roundabout theory, if I don't ENJOY the pain for the pain itself, then why bother causing it? HAHA. OK. Anyway, I've been trying to work this out for the longest time, but recently when I've asked him the same question, he's gotten more and more comfortable with the idea that he enjoys hurting me. He does enjoy inflicting pain, he admits. Well then, that's that dilemma solved, I say. 

And he loves to inflict pain on my nipples because I "react" he says. Well, ok, I do like the pinching and twisting BEFORE sex. Or DURING. It really is a magic button. Heh.

But the other thing about nipples... I wrote something about it at the beginning of this blog, I can't remember where (and I've spent too much time trying to look for it, in vain) - one of my exes, wait maybe 2, used to do this thing where they'd sit next to me and cross their arms and use their fingers, hidden under the other arm, to reach across and fiddle with my nipples. I didn't like it. It used to annoy me. Even worse was that I'd told them so but they didn't respect my wishes for it to stop, instead they both insisted "But no one can see... ". But that wasn't the point was it? Pffft. 

So when BIKSS started doing that (IN BED, IN BED, in the privacy of the bedroom because he's a stickler for proper behaviour in public, right down to covering a yawn - yes I get told off every single time, and not with the fondness of a lover but with the sternness of an authoritarian!) I initially flinched and told him that it made me feel cheap and like a piece of meat. 

He reassured me that 1) I'm his sub and he will touch me where he pleases, 2) he only wants to touch my nipples because he loves how they feel in his hands, and he enjoys touching my body in general, 3) that every time he touches them he'll remind me of number 2. And for the most part he has, in the beginning anyway. But I realised that I must have learnt this lesson some time ago, cos I would somehow make mention of it before he did. And that night wasn't any different. 

"I don't like it, but I like it you know?" I told him. "I mean, I'm still not thrilled at having my nipples twiddled with just lying here and hanging out together, but I *do* like that you do it anyway because it reminds me that I'm submitting to you." 

"I know," he said simply. 

And now, on that nipply note, I found these on Shein as I was looking for some white tees for my cousin, since it was free-shipping-day. OK, admittedly they didn't appear out of nowhere. I was searching for nipple covers. And THEN they popped up! (And yes, they sell nipple covers too!)

And since they were so cheap ($3 bucks each, local ccy) I got them both before BIKSS answered my question of "Which one do you think I should get". His answer was also "Ooh, both".

But while I was there, on the "body jewellery" page, I found some other things :

Pretty things no? One doesn't have to only shop the VS site for such things no more.

And then I saw they had a "personal care" section under BEAUTY so I went browsing.... and compiled this bunch of pictures. Wanna play? I'm going to have them numbered... and if you like you can write down what you think they are in the comments below! (Some of them are pretty easy, but others may be less commonly seen in your part of the world.)

And with that I shall bid you all a Happy Week Ahead!

My mood pic today ~

ANOTHER HUGE PS - The announcement this time -  Bleue's blog is back up! And if you already knew this, I'm sorry. I'm kinda late to the party. Thank goodness she popped by yesterday to leave a comment here. Go visit, or make a new friend. Her "about" page is linked here. 

Random Things to Share with You All - Glamping and Italian

On our most recent trip to the beach for our exercise walk we saw a bunch of "glamping" tents and marveled at why people would pay $200 to rent one of these things just so they could sleep on the floor in public with no access to amenities. It's definitely NOT for me... can you tell?

Still, some of them are quite pretty. I apologise that they're not the best pictures, but if you look closely enough and ignore the grainy images, you can see the fairy lights in the tents. I think that's the prettiest part of the whole thing. And there are little window flaps that people can shut when they want some sexy time privacy! 

We also went to our favourite Italian / meatball place recently but sadly our friendly Italian chef has decided to quit making Tiramisu as he ended up with too much wastage (Covid has hurt him quite a fair bit).

He HAS however changed his menu a little and there are more low-carb options now. I'm loving the chicken wrap with teriyaki and mayo sauce with truffle oil drizzled over the top, as well as the garlic tiger prawns tapas!

(The inside of the wrap)

(Those were pretty huge prawns, the bowl just happens to be huger!)

Given that it's just a little bit outside the business district and in an area where food isn't expected to be cheap, this meal was a steal at just under USD$15. Our cheapest dinner there yet! 

If he continues to have these low carb things on the menu, I just might want to go back there more often. 

My mood pic today ~ 

And one for the Guys (and Gals too of course!)

(In which I geek out about fashion / colour so skip this post if it's not your thing.)

So BIKSS has this dark blue / white stripe shirt that is a pretty decent shirt on its own. And in the past he's worn stuff like that before without much problem. But recently I'm finding the grey/white one suits him better than the blue/white version. 

I got to looking at colour contrast and value contrast and lo and behold... his hair colour is affecting how his clothes look on him. 

VALUE CONTRAST

In a nutshell - if you have more contrast between your hair/eyes and your skin, then you're a HIGH value contrast type (like me - blackish hair black eyes, fair skin, especially now that I no longer swim so I don't have that bronze tan no more). 

BIKSS is a low value contrast type cos his hair is mostly silver and his skin isn't the tannest right now (since he hasn't been out in the sun - fishing - in a long long time)!

And so here's a basic rule of matching your colours. Of course, you can (and should) just wear whatever the hell you want if it makes you happy, but if you don't  have anything you love in particular, read on.

This particular website is tailored specifically for guys... so have a go. It's quite simple... altho BIKSS remarked that going thru all this felt like studying for a test. LOL. 

My Hair is in the 9-10 range, and my skin is somewhere around 2. That makes my value contrast more than 7.  ie.  HIGH

BIKSS is 4 and 1 and so his value contrast is 3. ie. LOW

Once you know if you're high, medium, or low value contrast, click the link to see how to choose outfit combinations that suit your natural contrast level.

HOW TO USE CONTRAST TO CREATE KICK-ASS CLOTHING COMBINATIONS

(The summary is, if you're HIGH v.contrast, then you pair dark with light (eg black and white, dark grey and light pink). If you're LOW v.contrast, then you wear light with light or dark with dark (eg charcoal grey with black, beige and white) . If you're MEDIUM then you can afford to mix and match the lights and the darks, but in general, light with medium or medium and dark would suit you best!)

COLOUR CONTRAST

Now that you know your value contrast, work out your COLOUR contrast - ie, how many colours you can handle on your body at any one time. (It roughly boils down to whether your natural body has more "neutrals" or more "colours".)

So I'm more of a neutral, monochromatic, maybe analogous colouring - Dark brown hair, dark brown eyes, and a beige/slightly rosy skintone. BIKSS is pretty much the same, in terms of colour contrast. Meaning, we probably look our best in just all neutrals, shades of just ONE colour (find out what your season colour is in the links I posted here), or mostly neutral + one small colour accent. (As opposed to someone who has red hair and blue eyes and could wear a super colourful bright top!) 

This video explains it quite simply - 

How to figure out your colour contrast

There was another website that I found some time ago, but I can't figure out how to get back there... sigh. The fleeting nature of internet searches!

However this website also has a very simple way of figuring our your colour contrast - 

Start by reading this - 

Let’s clarify the basics!

Hair: Brown, Grey, and some Blonde hair is neutral. Redheads and very yellow-haired Blondes have colored hair. Hair dyed “unnatural colors” (green, pink, unicorn, mermaid, etc.) is also colored hair.

Eyes: Brown and grey eyes are neutral; blue, green, violet, and hazel eyes are colored.

Skin: Skin is a little more nuanced… Most people I meet have neutral skin, but some have very pink or very yellowish skin; these read as colored for Color Contrast purposes. Some people confuse having a dark complexion with having colored skin, but dark complexions–like fair–can be neutral or colored.

(BIKSS and I are both 3Ns - neutral hair, neutral eyes, neutral skin -neither pink nor yellow ie LOW colour contrast.)

To find out if you're high or low colour contrast, you will need to know how many Ns you are and how many Cs.

And then you'll be able to tell whether you look the most balanced in a monochromatic outfit or in a combo that contains multiple colours! 

THIS website also has the same neutral vs colour method - the chart is easier to read on this one, but I prefer the descriptions of what to wear in the previous link. Have a look - 

OK, I see how this can be complicated. I didn't realise till I was writing this post. But if you stick with it you'll either be able to figure out why some outfits work and others don't, or like me, you'll go "A-ha... that explains the colours in my wardrobe and how I put things together!" 

My wardrobe consists of mostly neutrals: lots of blacks, a few whites and some dark browns and navies. I have coloured tops but most are flat (plain, non printed), or monochromatic if they are patterned. I like wearing HIGH value contrast outfits, like black and white, or a coloured top and black pants, but LOW colour contrast - so just one colour at a time - today I had on a white and navy striped top with navy pants. Altho one could argue that navy might also count as being a neutral. When I do wear jeans, my tops are either blue or black. Leopard prints? No biggie. A black or brown piece works great with it. 

This also explains why when I wore my medium leopard skirt with a beige/cream top during Chinese New Year, my mum commented that it was a terrible colour on me. Cream is just NOT my colour. And there probably wasn't enough value contrast. (Of the three outfits in that post, the red one probably looked the best on me.)

I'm glad my gut figured this out on its own without me first having to learn all of it. But it was fun finding out the logic behind why it works!

And if all that was too much trouble, you can just try and suss out what colour contrast means from in this pic - 

one colour - low c.contrast 

two colours (usually analogous, or next to each other on the colour wheel) - medium c.contrast 

more than two colours - high c.contrast (or two complementary colours on the colour wheel) 

But now you've reached the end of Fashion Contrast 101!  Feel free to tell me what contrast levels you are in the comments below! 

My mood pic today ~

HUGE PS - There's a new blogger in town. Have a visit at Claire's if you haven't already, and let's show her some blogging love! 

My Ankle Is Shot

I had planned another post for this evening, but right now the only thing that's on my mind is the pain in my foot. 

My boss thinks it's this - 

Extensor Tendonitis/Tendinopathy

Yesterday morning I woke up with a pain in my right ankle. But it wasn't bad enough that I couldn't limp around. So I went to work, came home, baked my layer cakes... and thought nothing more of it. Initially we thought I had twisted it and my ATFL might have been stretched. I did walk on some uneven hilly ground on the way to take mum to her jab the evening before... so maybe there was some stress there that I didn't feel at the time. 

This morning I woke up with a massive pain all around my foot. The ankle wouldn't take my weight and I couldn't stand up to get out of bed. 

Eventually, after 3-4 minutes I managed to hobble to the shower and got ready to dress for work. I texted my boss and asked him to get me at the guardhouse of my workplace, as I would be cabbing in today. No bus for me with this pain. I figured once I got there he'd be able to sort me out with a diclofenac jab. And all would be well.. 

I was wrong. While trying to get dressed I decided that I needed to admit defeat. So I told him I wouldn't be coming in today. 

My mum's caregiver pushed me to the clinic nearby in my mum's wheelchair. And eventually I managed to get into the consult room. Where he gave me a jab, and decided that it was probably gout. 

No one else is convinced that that's what it is tho. The bone doesn't hurt, only the fleshy bits on the top of the foot. My annual labs show a very low level of uric acid, my kidneys are working fine, and I don't even take any alcohol or red meat or processed meats. 

Seafood is expensive here so if we DO have prawns, they work out to maybe 1-2 per serving, and I don't eat them at every meal either. 

My boss is certain it's not gout. Instead, he thinks I might have strained my extensor digitorum longus. The tendon that connects the muscles in the lower leg to the 4 small toes. (Left of the pic below.)

So I'm to pop more NSAIDS at 4pm, 100 mg of diclofenac he says, and I've taken 30 mg of pred, and I've been sitting here with an ice pack on my foot (pic below). It's less painful than it was 6 hours ago, but there are still sharp jolts of pain when I walk. Meanwhile I'm just glad that we have a wheelchair in the house, AND I've taken over mum's walking stick!

I'm supposed to have dinner with BIKSS this evening and we're to drop off a cake at an old neighbour's house. I guess I'll hobble to the car and spend the rest of dinner IN it, while he helps me with the cake delivery. 

As to how it happened? I'm getting older, is about all that we know. Mr Tendon and Ms Ligament aren't as strong as they used to be... not surprising really, given how much I walk. I guess they have a lower stress threshold overall. 

Sux. I wish they'd have given me some advance warning tho. Instead of hitting me like a ton of bricks. 

And since misery loves company, feel free to share YOUR aches and pains with me today. I'm sure it'll make me feel better knowing I'm not the only one dealing with Getting-Older-itis.

My mood pic today ~ 

Pleasantly Surprised

Females. Girls. Women. We might be living in the safest, most modern of cities, it could be night or day, there may be a crowd or it could be secluded. But one thing is pretty universal - no matter how old or young we are, wherever we are, if there's a dude just loitering by his lonesome we walk a little farther away, we quicken our pace, we look down and pretend not to notice him. 

At least I do. It's the way things are over here. I mean if a guy is walking along, doing stuff, or standing by a bin having a smoke, or taking a breather with a drink in his hand / eating a sandwich,  I would probably just continue on as normal. I'm talking about the blokes who are just standing there in the middle of nowhere and seemingly not doing anything. Those I make it a point to steer clear of.

Which is why when BIKSS came to get me with a brolly, I walked hurriedly away instead of towards him.

Let me explain. 

He drove me to a friend's place for a pick up (I do that food rescue thing remember?) and the carpark is a slight distance away from her block of flats. There is another building that I need walk through to get to hers, and I thought it best to just zip in and out, while BIKSS waited in the car. It had been drizzling on and off all evening and he asked if  I would like him to do the pick up instead. I said no thanks, after all he had already taken the trouble to drive me over there. 

So he said ok, and that he'd wait in the carpark.

Off I went and got my things. As I was heading back to the car the rain had gotten heavier, but I didn't know this as I was under shelter. 

As I came out into the open area I saw a rather large-ish fella hanging around the walkway with an umbrella. It was dark but I could see the car so I made to dash as quickly as I could towards it, adjusting my route so that I walked on the farthest side of him as possible, given whatever space there was.

Only to be accosted by Daddy who had gotten out to wait for me with a brolly so that I wouldn't have to take the 10 steps to the car in the rain. It wasn't pouring mind you, and it was light enough that I wouldn't have used a brolly even if I had one on me. 

But here he was, ready to shelter me back to the car cos it had started to rain. 

And I thought that was the sweetest thing ever!

He, on the other hand, was baffled by my behaviour. He wondered why I was walking so quickly and where I going, cos I seem to have altered course! LOL. 

This led to a lively chat. About how as women we tend to adjust our walk to keep a "safer" distance from certain men, about how when we get into a lift it's reassuring if the lone fella in there takes a step away as if to say "Here, I'll give you more personal space", about how when a guy gets into a lift if we're there first, whether they might get offended if WE moved farther away from the door. And about how all these things aren't formally taught, but get passed down from one generation to the next.

And conversely, those who have NO manners at all and won't even budge when you get into the lift,  guy OR girl!

What do you think? Have you found yourself moving out of a guy's way, or if you're a guy, how have you felt when a woman moved farther away from you... did you feel offended?

I saw this on FB and thought it made a lot of sense. What do you think?

(And there is no mood pic today cos I'm being pensive and reflecting on what he ^ said.)

My Best Haul Yet

...and probably the most 'useless' LOL!

I ordered some "sexy" clothing from Shein as I was looking for something to go over (or under) the white V-neck very-see-through blouse I got some time ago. 

This was the order - I paid USD$30 for the lot. (Click to see larger pic)

(I have pictures of how they look on me below, except for the bodysuit which was just too see-thru and it was too much bother to take it off, put on a bra, then pull it on again just for a photo... cos it was the last thing I tried on and I was too tired by then.)

And now (drum roll please....) here they are IRL - 

1) A pretty red see thru glitter stretchy number that works great under a spaghetti top too - for more coverage when too much skin is not quite appropriate. (Shown with a full-length lace cami underneath.)

2) The same style in black. Because I just absolutely love these types of tops. (Shown with a cropped lace cami underneath)

3) Flocked mesh top which left a very light layer of black fluff on my table top and bed ... I'm hoping after a wash it'll be all gone. The beige actually matches my skin colour EXACTLY so I played "find the nipples" with BIKSS when I sent him the photo. I quite like it as a layering piece too.

4) White lace layering top - who doesn't love white lace? It's so pretty and delicate. I love the detail at the neckline. That's the V neck white top underneath. Ta-da - NO more bra show-age! (Please excuse the open underwear drawer behind me... )

5) And finally, a tie-front cardi that I'm loving for how easy it is to chuck into my work handbag. It's not as long as a standard cardi, so it takes up less space. The open front is good for being able to still see the top I'm wearing, and the ties hold the front panels in place and keep them from "flapping" about (which is what usually happens, much to my annoyance, with an unbuttoned traditional or open front cardi). Again, shown here over the V neck white top I mentioned.

 

I know we're coming into Spring and Summer soon, but since I'm more of a Winter colouring, I tend to gravitate towards these sombre colours and steer clear of brights and pastels (they look terrible) on me. If you're interested to find out what your colour season is, click one of these links -

1) Simpler / takes a shorter time - Laurie Loo's Seasonal Color Analysis Quiz 

2) More answer options / too complicated for me - 30SomethingUrbanGirl's Find Your Color Palette 

3) A super quick basic version of the 30something quiz on the ProProfs Quizzes site

If you did any of the quizzes or you already know your season colour - let me know what you are! I'm so curious as many of us here in where-I-live have the usual black hair and black eyes. It gets boring! 

And as for my haul, did you have a favourite? Let me know in the comments if you liked any of the tops in particular. I love fashion feedback!

PS. Mum had her first jab today and all is well! 

My mood pic today ~ 

A Slightly Wordy Tuesday

Thank you all for your questions. I will have to take some time to go through them, write out thoughtful answers (or get BIKSS to write them out with me) and then I'll put them all up in a post with the links to other bloggers' answers to my Rank 3 Favourite Weapons question. 

Meanwhile, enjoy this selection of wordy (some of them, anyway) toons. 

1. I saw this on the Shein website - I'm pretty sure they mean EYElashes, but that's not where my brain went. Also one of these days I think I shall share all the lovely kinky things I have seen on their website. It's amazing what they have for sale.

2. I'm happy to say, I'm not a narcissist. BIKSS skipped the 1st step when he saw "take a moment to think" and went straight to step 2!

3. I found this one to be hilarious. You need to know who St Patrick and Medusa are for it to work. Click the links to find out more about these 2 who should never be together.

4. I LOL-ed at this one when I saw it first thing yesterday morning. While I was still in bed.  AFTER I texted my Good Mornings to BIKSS, of course. Tsk. 

5. For all the writers / teachers / editors etc out there.... I thought it was rather clever!

6. This one made me laugh too! It's true tho, the absurdity of all those problem sums.

7. I remember when *I* was that teenage daughter. Hahahaha. If you have / had a teenager in the house, let us know in the comments if this was true for you!

8. I remember when I was about 9, I was SO proud of myself for learning the word "onomatopoeia". AND being able to spell it!

As always, let me know if you have a favourite, and please regale me with personal stories / anecdotes if any of these reminded you of something! 

March Questions It Is

I wasn't sure if we were still doing March questions. But since I've seen a few bloggers posting up invitations for it, here we go. 

If you have a question, leave it in the comments or email me --> there's an email address on the right of this page just below the "Keep Out" box. 

But if you DON'T have a question but want to play along, I've left this little nugget on a few of my blogfriends' blogs and if you'd like to answer it, go right ahead! 

I'll compile everything (if I manage to find everyone's answers) and put it up here first week of April sometime. 

Name 3 implements that are employed regularly (besides the hand) on your behind (or your spankee's behind) and rank them in order of preference.

I'll add my answer to the compilation post. 

Meanwhile, have a good week ahead!

My mood pic today ~ 

Mulling - The Friday Sex Talk (and a Reminder Spanking!)

**ULTRA LONG POST ADVISORY**

We went out to dinner last night, and after a lovely meal in a quiet-ish corner of the restaurant where I ate too much I told him I realised that when I get busy and don't have time for myself (running around with errands, taking mum to check-ups, dealing with admin / mail, sorting through old photographs - another bag arrived!) it's not so much that I can't do the things I want to do, but more a case of not being able to sit with myself and mull over things. 

"I'm definitely NOT a muller," he said to me. 

Which led to a lovely exploring-each-others'-brains type of conversation in the car. I love those types of chats. 

Eventually we got to talking about how I'm the MOST turned on and tingly when he does something that asserts his power. Mostly in the bedroom, but in reality, anytime he does a Daddy type thing that pulls me back or reminds me of my place I get a bit warm and fuzzy in my belly. 

Turns out I would get more than I bargained for tonight.

Dinner was at the quiet resort-atmosphere-esque restaurant where we celebrated both our birthdays. We tried a traditional Indonesian dish of Tahu Telor, but with a local twist - a Malay spicy soy sauce instead of the usual sweet version. It was so huge. Thankfully the bottom half was all fluffly deep fried egg white!

(We had them take the dish back and sauté the prawns cos it came cold, even tho the waiter reassured us it was served warm - I can't handle cold prawns... gives me the runs! After that it was fantastic.)

With the spicy soy sauce drizzled over.

Fried chicken wings with kicap (kee-chup) manis (mah-nis) - a spicy, thick, syrupy, sweet soy sauce popular in Malay / Indonesian kitchens - comp-ed, as per their usual custom.

Salmon lemongrass - BIKSS is particularly fond of fish - and rather a stickler for having it done properly. So far he has had only good things to say about the fish mains we've had at this chain.

Instead of cake, we ordered (and paid for) a cempedak crumble. I think it might have been the best dessert I've eaten at this chain of restaurants so far. Mayhaps the overdose of free cakes might have something to do with that. I don't know how to describe cempedak to you except to say it's related to the jackfruit, but the flesh is a creamier and more fibrous texture. It's a very rich flavour, even pungent, but very sweet. 

As BIKSS prefers cake to crumble, and me the reverse, we had a difference of opinion regarding which was the better dessert! LOL. (They did still give us two slices to take home with us, and this time he took them home cos I was just up to my eyeballs in cake by now.)

When we were safely hidden away in the room, I began to undress, letting the spaghetti strap of my dress fall off my shoulder. 

"I like how that's coming off you," he remarked. And came over to assist. Soon I was in my lace panties and nothing else, sitting on the bed and facing his crotch. He undid his jeans and freed Roger from his shorts. I immediately began sucking. 

As we had been discussing how power and dominance turns me on earlier, he took the opportunity to ramp up his Daddy Dom game. Gentle caresses were abandoned in favour of sudden nipple pinches. Hair stroking for neck grabbing. Kissing for slaps across my cheek. 

My legs were spread and held open, his fingers playing with my clit, then pussy. And one finger found its way into my bum hole. I mean, yes, I had been thinking about it recently, but most of the time he'll check with me if I'm having a 'good' bum day. 

Not this night tho. 

After some time of being lost in the sensations down below he asked me if he thought I could handle Roger. I said yes. And he got the lube. 

Anal sex isn't pleasurable for me physically. It doesn't hurt if I'm in a receptive enough state. But it's nowhere near pleasurable. More like tolerable. I do it because it's the one thing I can offer him that isn't "good" or "okay" or "neutral" to me. It's a bit to the left of neutral, creeping into the "dislike" zone. 

And when I'm giving him something I don't like, that makes me feel very submissive. 

After cleaning up we talked about the spectrum of our sexual encounters, from plain ol' / simple all the way to phenomenal, and where our different adventures lie on a scale of 0 to 10. 

We also talked about what was something that I "didn't like" that I could offer as a form of submission, on par with the act of offering anal, but that would still let him fuck pussy instead of butt (cos he still prefers that, in terms of physical sensations). Somehow topics like threesomes and 2-couple/partner-swapping sex came up and as he presented these scenarios to me he started fiddling with me again. 

When we had sex this time around it seemed like he might not cum, having had one quite soon before, but when I proposed my own scenario... 

"What if you were watching someone else fuck me the way you are now... seeing his cock thrusting into my pussy like that..."

...he stuck his thumb in my mouth and I sucked it hard.

He countered with "Maybe I won't be just watching, I would fuck your mouth, and you would suck on Roger just like that." (BTW, dirty talk isn't something we do often, I feel kinda strange doing it TBH... but it felt right at that point.)

That must have done something for him cos he came, sweaty and panting after prolonged exertion. 

We talked about why it wouldn't be possible for me to enjoy something like that tho'. The conclusion I came to was that I wouldn't be able to manage switching between little (which I reserve ONLY for BIKSS) and controlling bitch (which is how I've always been with all other sex partners). And that would cause a problem because I refuse to be a sub for another man, but it's not as if I can be domineering and such to a fella my Dom is directing me to fuck right? And even if he said I could be as sassy and dommy as I wanted, it would be weird being that way in bed with the fella while still taking instruction (as a little) from Daddy who's watching from the sidelines, no?

As he mm-hmm-ed his agreement with my analysis, BIKSS turned on his side and reached for my pussy. Without thinking (possibly cos part of my brain was in bitch mode) I swatted his hand away. And not in that playful Don't, Daddy way either. He told me later he was rather taken aback that I did that. He reacted by smacking my inner thigh immediately with a pretty stern "What was that?" I did say "Sorry Daddy", but I think it was an automatic reflex. I don't think anything was registering in my brain. I sure as hell didn't MEAN it.

Then he smacked me again. "Hm? What was that? Swatting my hand away?"  If he had left it there - which he said he actually thought was enough to jolt me back to the present - I think I would have started a fight cos I was still in default sass-bitch headspace. But he didn't. He pushed my legs apart and held my face in place with the arm that was under me, then continued smacking my inner thighs, alternating between sides, sometimes doubling up on the same side, just to keep me guessing, I suppose. 

In the calmest, smoothest voice he spoke into my ear. "Someone's forgotten her place, hm? You're Daddy's little girl, don't you forget it. You don't swat my hand away. What was that about? Daddy's girl doesn't do that. Right? No. She doesn't slap my hand away when I reach for her."

All through his litany he was smacking. And finally I felt it. And it hurt! Funny I didn't feel it till now. The sting was coming through, breaking into my thoughts and consciousness. I realised *then* what I had done. But it wasn't till he was almost at the end of the smacking that I apologised again. And meant it this time. 

(He did say a large part of the continuation after the first two smacks was just going along with the scene, but that maybe 10-20% of it was genuine "chastisement". I told him it was a good thing he went on.  If I were to hazard a guess I don't think BIKSS was aware of just how serious/significant that little episode was to me until I told him either.) 

When he was done spanking me I put my legs together and turned towards him, burying my face in his chest. He held me and comforted me. I didn't know what had come over me, but that spanking was definitely a good call. My thighs continued stinging for some time after that, let me tell you.

Earlier in the evening I had asked if we could play with the cane... he said yes but instead of doing so BEFORE the sex, it seems he intended that our cane session would come at the end. Cos he wanted to do that NOW. 

"Ready for your cane?"

Looking up at him, I shook my head, no. 

"4 stripes." 

"Wait wait wait!" 

He chortled.

"Why are you laughing Daddy?"

"Cos you suddenly sounded so desperate and alarmed."

That's when I said "I think I'm feeling a bit fragile about what just happened to play with the cane right now. What was that about, the smacking my inner thighs?" 

"A reminder. Reset. You were lost in your old self. It wasn't a punishment. I just needed to pull you back." 

"I know. But that's cos you were talking about having me be with other people, and you know how I used to be with the others ...  so it's your fault!" 

"It is. And I will accept the blame for that."

And he kissed me and rubbed my back, and held me tight some more. We talked and I said all the things I needed to say and asked all the things I needed to ask. When I was eventually done working out what happened, I thanked him for the spanking. He checked if I was feeling ok. Yes, I said. 

"I think you can get the cane now, I could do with a proper reset."

He got up to get it as I turned over to lie on my front. 

Tap tap tap tap Swish... and it went on like that till he had gotten in the 4 strokes he had promised. Then he said "6."

So he continued the tappety taps with intermittent proper swishes in between till he reached the number he wanted.

Then he stopped. And he came to lie down and hold me tight. 

Later, as he was about to get up to get dressed he picked up the cane again, it had been placed beside me so his hand found it easily enough, and proceeded to swat my inner thighs with it. 

It wasn't a spanking session per se, we were just experimenting with it. It felt really good. And probably way more efficient than a traditional ass spanking, imho. I get an ouchier (and more lingering) sting from a much lighter stroke on my thigh than from a heavier one on my butt.

"You know, of all the toys, the cane really IS my favourite." 

My mood pic today ~

Mulling - The Thursday Dinner and Post-Coital Thoughts

Mum had her hearing aid fitting appointment on Thursday. Before that the sister took us to lunch, and after that BIKSS took us to dinner. 

I was in and out of the house all afternoon and did absolutely NOTHING else besides see to the mother. My caregiver was off that day so I was on duty!  (Explains why I wasn't around Blogland much.)

The appointment went well enough, and we will go back 1st week of May to collect it. It was cute how they squeezed some pink paste into mum's ear to make a cast. I don't think they did that for the last ones she had, or dad's either. 

Anyway we had fish noodle soup and cereal fish and chips (for us) at the recently discovered Halal Chinese place. 

I thought it was quite delicious. We had a total of 4 slices of free cake and a complimentary starter. And a repeat order of my lettuce-wrapped chicken.

The green thing is a pandan flavoured chiffon type cake with a lovely light cream between the layers.

After dinner we got mum home and settled in for the night then I had a shower and collapsed into bed with BIKSS. 

I spent way too much time stroking Roger with my cheeks, nuzzling my face against his smooth velvety skin, inhaling his scent, a not-unpleasant musk coupled with fresh notes of laundry detergent from the shorts that he had been tucked into. 

Eventually I enveloped him in my mouth and BIKSS let out a satisfied groan... the sudden expulsion of air at the beginning of which signalling the jolt of pleasure at finding his cock in a warm wet orifice.

I was kneeling beside him and he had easy access to my nipples. He tweaked them. Hard. I got tingly and wet. He held my head down against himself, the right side of my face finding a pillow in his belly. 

And he fucked my mouth. I couldn't move, my head was pinned. I couldn't suck for trying to keep the seal tight around his cock so I wouldn't drool (too much). I couldn't use my tongue because he was thrusting according to a rhythm that escaped any matching co-ordination on my part. 

Then he muttered something that I couldn't make out until I felt a thickening of the pool of saliva in my mouth, and the familiar taste of his cream coating my tongue. Oh. "Daddy's gonna cum" is what he said. 

---

This time it was different. I told him. Usually I'm kneeling over him from between his legs, like this -

..and when he holds me by my hair I can at least adjust the angle of my head over him, allowing me to tweak the angle in which he thrusts into my mouth or at least move my head in a slight arc up and down over his cock, if not in and out. 

(I can at least move my head this way, with my forehead as a pivot and my chin moving away, 

in a sort of reverse nod.)

Even if I can't move this way straight up and down without having to bend my neck. 

So anyway. When my face is (being held down) sideways against his belly I can't move any way at all. So it felt like all I could do was be a mouth for him to fuck. And that felt really good. (Like this - it's not me but I didn't think I should plaster her face for the world to see.. even if it IS from the interweb.) 

I usually feel "powerful" when I'm giving BIKSS a blowjob, but this time even that one instance of power was wrested from me. 

Which is when I got to thinking - I'm most turned on when he does things TO ME for HIS benefit and enjoyment, as opposed to when he does something FOR ME for MY enjoyment. 

It's a given, of course, that even tho' the nipple tweaks and hard finger-fucking and face-slapping are all for me, they're primarily a show of force, an assertion of his power. 

So while some get off on humiliation, others on service, I think my biggest turn on is when I find myself in a position where I have been forced to yield.

My mood pic today ~