Feeding (and getting) Dominance through Submission

First some facts - 

1) Orgasm denial is NOT a thing we do. BIKSS is always happy for me to climax, either with him, or on my own. 

2) To do this, I employ a vibrator because that's just the way I roll. 

3) The more regularly I cum, the more difficult it is for me to have the next one. And this isn't just about having multiple cums on the same day, or during the same session. In my experience, it's a whole lot easier to have a cum if I haven't had one in the last couple of days. Daily orgasms only ensure more tired muscles and taking a longer time to achieve climax the next time I try. 

And now to our story. 

Which begins when BIKSS was still on his worktrip. 

I had been feeling particularly horny, as I've mentioned in recent posts. And I think that's because it's the first week after my period which is always a horny time for me, in addition to having a lot less stress in terms of worry about the parents *AND* having made a decision to take a break from choir for a while. 

And we all know that when Fondles is stressed everything goes haywire. Libido included. So when the stress is lifted... it's all systems go! 

I shared some gifs with BIKSS on his second last day away, as I was being particularly playful. And I mean, teasing him is always good fun! 

Along my travels around the web I came across a bunch of "how to be a good submissive" type of articles and blogs. And that got me thinking about our own dynamic. I float in and out of submission - when everything is stable in my life, I crave more D/s. When things are crappy all thoughts of D/s are out the window. 

That I'm thinking about submission now is a good sign if I'm using that to measure my emotional and mental state. And boy did I feel like I needed him to be a Dom right now. 

For some, what I do might seem like topping from the bottom. But this sort of thing works for us because we're not quite a 24/7 TTWD couple. And I have loads to do on my own that BIKSS doesn't get involved with. So it's always useful for me to give him hints when I am able to handle a larger dose of Dominance. 

So what did I do? I sent him this.

Along with the words - my panties are wet. I had been stroking my clit thru my panties and it was getting me mega-ly turned on. 

And then I stupidly suggested that I would not have any more orgasms till I saw him on Monday.

He replies "Good idea. Wait till Monday." 

And of course that didn't stop me from continuing to touch myself, because, well, telling me to wait just made me hornier. But I didn't dare use the vibe, cos I was surely going to cum if I did. So fingers it is!

That rat! Hrmph. (I mean the sticker, not BIKSS!) And now whenever I'm feeling hot and bothered I'm supposed to touch myself more? I eventually got round to cleaning the house and then hopping into the shower. But I couldn't resist spraying my clit with delicious bursts of water from the shower head. I have been known to cum that way, so it was all I could do to stop myself whenever I got too close. 

Well. This is doing a marvelous job keeping me feeling submissive - and feeling owned. Especially since it's not a usual part of our dynamic. But then again, I *did* want more Dominance. 

Long Distance Dominance

"Show me your pussy."

I move the fone down so that the camera is in front of my slit.

"Good girl" he says.

"Spread your legs."

I do so, awkwardly, shuffling my feet apart.

I take that to mean he wants a closer look. So I use the fingers of my free hand to spread my outer lips.

He says something that tells me he approves of this. But I don't remember the exact words.

I'm feeling a flood of submission. My cunt is getting wet. I've just been in the shower getting clean. And now he's gone and made me dirty again in under 10 words.

"That's going to get a nice spanking when I come back on Monday." I know I'm dismissed and can carry on with getting dressed.

But still I ask. "Can I put on my shirt now?"

He says yes.

"Pussy's getting spanked too?"

"Yes."

"But I didn't ask for a pussy spanking... just a bum spanking."

"It's a package deal."

Video calls. Delivering Dominance whenever you need it.

How To Take Sexy-As-Hell Selfies (As Explained By Naked Barbie)

FFF 2.0 - 13 Quarter One and Piano Muscles

We're at the end of the first quarter everyone. My weight is creeping back up bit by bit, but I'm watching it carefully and being very prudent with my eating habits. (Except for the cheddar flavoured ruffles, I mean, it was RIGHT THERE!)

Last week's steps -

Average - 10,740
Highest no - 14,439
>10k days - 4

Here's Roz:

And here's my update: I did my exercises 6/7 days and have been walking the stairs at work.

Our darling Olivia needs a boost / push / thwack on her libido. And life, in general, could be better. Go over and say hi. 

In educational health/body matters, this week I've been looking at muscles that are used when playing the piano.

Cos I played for an hour and a half on Wednesday night and my shoulder started aching. It could also have been the result of the swim on Tuesday, who knows! But here are some interesting things if you're a pianist, live with one, or would like to be one someday. Or if you're just geeky about this sort of thing. (If not, then maybe you should give the links a miss!)

Enjoy.

What we Play the Piano with

Hand / Finger / Body Motions and Technique aka a long chapter on Flat Finger Playing

A Guide to Good Practising. Including warm ups.

Hysterical Lit and Gifs

I'd forgotten how much fun D/s gifs could be. Well, that and the fact that I'm super horny cos it's the week after my period. And BIKSS is away.

And well, ok, I was feeling fired up all day so I came home and looked at a few videos on Thumbzilla and then told Daddy I wanted to cum. He is always enthusiastic for me to jill off. So I did. 

It was great.

Here are some of the GIFs I spammed his fone with - I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.

Christopher Plummer in The Sound of Music. The stuff that many of my daydreams (and wet ones) were made of. Naval Officer. Military uniform. All the things I love. Or maybe this is why I love them. Ahem. 

Because I listened to a Kayla Lords podcast from 2015 and realised I need a good spanking. It has been too long - not only this week while BIKSS is away, but even before that. While the father was in hospital, I needed more feeding than usual. You see, having to deal with running up and down to and from the hospital meant I didn't want to fuss with making dinner, so we ate out quite a fair bit, which didn't leave us a lot of time for spanking when we came home to play after dinner. 

He called me a 'dream bunny' one night. If I were a bunny I would totally do that. Wait. I already nuzzle my face in Daddy's hand/s whenever I can. 

He has done this. I like when he sticks his finger / thumb in my mouth, oh and Roger, of course. Yeah, but we knew that. Actually, I just like it when he has his hand/s anywhere near my face, mouth, chin, neck. Mmm. And she clearly likes it too!

I miss kneeling with my head in his lap. That's all. 

And this one.. well, this one's just hot. Squatting. Where's the dignity in that? And fully clothed. And hands immobilised. And he's looking right at her as he violates her pussy. HOT HOT HOT. 

I've also looked at a couple of the sessions on Hysterical Literature and realise that watching women's faces while they orgasm /  are being pleasured does absolutely nothing for me. I've spoken about this with some male friends before, and they are convinced it's a guy thing. Me, I prefer the gasping, moaning, suffering submissive at the mercy of her Dom. I knew it as 'rough sex' before I ever heard the term BDSM. Who knew there was a reason for that. :)

See you Friday for FFF :)

The Post Dinner Fuck Before He Leaves

After dinner last Friday I had a hankering for cake so I randomly gave Daddy directions to turn this way and that on the way home, and we went thru some streets we normally don't have to drive thru... it was kinda fun. 

He offered to take me to the place I know will have good cake, but I didn't want to drive in the opposite direction of where we were going, so I said don't bother. Can you turn right? 

LOL. He sure could he said.

After 2 weeks of NO nooky, I said to him, you know we're going to go back and have sex, and I'm going to put Roger in my mouth - so at this point I figure you'll drive me anywhere I bluddy well wanna go. 

He laughed at that, and said, you're not wrong! We ARE going to have sex and you ARE going to put Roger in your mouth, but that's not why I'm driving you anywhere you want to go. I would do that anyway. Sex or no sex. 

We DID have sex. And I DID have Roger in my mouth. But not before I knelt in nothing but my knickers by the side of the bed and fed BIKSS some of the Chocolate Peanut Butter Stack we picked up from Starbucks. "Thank you for letting me spend your money," I said :) He laughed at that. I think he has it bad for me.. the way he finds everything I say amusing. 

But don't tell him I said that. Ha!

Halfway through kissing and fondling my nipples the tenant came home, so there was NO spanking cos #NOISE. But he made up for that with really hurting my left nipple. It got bad enough that I had to whine and tell him it hurt. I was grateful for the distraction of an erect cock in my mouth, fucking the back of my throat. But even that didn't take my mind off the pain. 

Oh, and cos I was lying on my side while he was pumping into my mouth, #DROOL. Ugh. I hate it. But he doesn't really care. So drool there was. 

Could I breathe? Not really. I had to take really shallow breaths. And concentrate on not choking at the same time. Not very successfully I might add. It's been a while since we played like this. I wouldn't say it was necessarily more kinky. It just seemed a bit more intense than usual. At least I didn't feel like puking up my cake!

There was some face slapping, of course. I mean, we were facing each other on our sides, and he wasn't lying on the side of his spanking hand. So... #SLAP away. 

I couldn't find an accurate pic, but best I could do was show you the thigh-pillow position, 

only flip the girl around so they've both got their feet pointing in the same direction.

Pussy was quite happy to have Roger again after a couple of weeks of NON action. Argh - that was way too long. And after he made NO sound as he was cumming, we spent the next half an hour on our fones, playing this new game he had introduced to me. Because we're comfortable like that. LOL

Before too long there was a round two - and I don't know if anyone experiences this - but when you've had ejaculate inside you does it make a mess when you go another round after? Cos it does for me. At the end of that round I could distinctly feel a wet patch under my left butt cheek. I left my legs in the air while I told BIKSS to check, and I think there might have been some residual spotting cos despite having laid down a towel, the bed and the blankie got a wee bit messed up. But the towel - #SPOTLESS. 

There was much laughter about this. And I ended up doing laundry in the middle of the night. But hey, all in the name of going-away-sex right? (Who am I kidding!? ANY sex!)

He'll be home on Saturday so hopefully the time will pass, and I will be bored at home and sleep early - I feel so sleep-deprived!

And then next monday we're celebrating 7 years! How time does fly.

See you soon!

FFF 2.0 - 12 The Father's Helper, The Choir Brat, and Salads

It's the first quarter of the year almost gone now, and things should hopefully be looking better soon. I say this with fingers crossed. 

The father is home again now with the interim (2 weeks) home-help full day service. The hospital has arranged for someone to come in and get him settled, with daily BP monitoring (3 times a day I hear) and physiotherapy (2ce a day) so he can practise walking with a steady gait. 

Mum will have to speak with her son to get him to agree to having live-in help in these 2 weeks and get that process started soon so that we'll continue to have someone around to keep an eye on the old man after the service period is up. 

I'm kinda just breathing through this and leaving it up to the universe at this point, cos everything that I can do, I have done. There really is no more for me to do or say. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In choir news - I'm a little bit annoyed at our musical director cos he's a child. He's spoiled and entitled. And I'm going to take a step back in stages. Come April I'm letting his newly appointed associate conductor (who is a favourite of his) take over sectional practices as per his wishes, and when the new committee is appointed in May I'm going to resign my position as head of logistics too. It's a thankless job, and if he's only going to be barking orders and blaming people (not just me, everyone on the committee) for not getting things done the way he wants them, then I'm not going to bother volunteering. The problem with him is he doesn't realise we're all doing this as volunteers and a little bit of thanks would go a long way.

My treasurer is also stepping down cos she's had enough of his bullshit. 

I'll be happy to just go to choir to sing. Which is what I originally inteded to do, just that they really needed help with things and I thought, why not. And THIS is why not evidently. I think the only people who ever sign up are the newbies - and then they realise he's a brat then they step down. LOL. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And now, the step count - 

Average - 10,919

Highest - 12,794

>10kdays - 5

[HERE IS ROZ'S UPDATE:

I'm a bit down on number of exercise days this week as other things happening has meant lack of time. I managed 4 days and continued walking the stairs at work.I still need to cut down on the sweets!]

And Olivia's post for FFF Sunday is here. :) Better late than never. 

My period finally came and is now gone. But this round it was particularly annoying in how long it took to finally get here. The long spotting period / PMS means I had many days of junk-food / big-appetite eating. This is probably why I got up to almost 59kg this round. I'm working hard to get back to my usual weight again now that it's over. 

For dinner last night we went somewhere new. We ended up along a street that we knew had a bunch of eateries, and decided to just pop into a random 'kitchen & bar' - that's what they call themselves. 

I didn't know soft tacos were a thing. Now I do. This one is miso tofu cubes. 

Which tasted a lot better than I expected. I'm definitely coming back to this place!

(I ate the filling and left the tortilla behind... oops.)

And that's the hand he spanks me with ;p

This was a green salad with grilled chicken. Which also tasted a lot better than I expected. 

BIKSS agrees that the food was pretty good!

(I left the arugula and croutons behind...)

Today after choir I had a salad with balsamic tofu, a hard boiled egg, and mixed grains sprinkled over the top. It was.. interesting. But no where as yummy as last night's chicken salad.

I'm going to be eating light for a week at least in order to get this weight back down. 

It's a constant battle. Le sigh. 

Have a good weekend.

(I also just noticed this is my 1000th post! Heh. Thank you all for still reading here, and for being my blogfriend!)

Tuesday Toon #48

The topic this week is - Life and death and getting from one to the other. Enjoy. Feel free to let me know which ones you liked!

(As always, thanks to BIKSS for the laughs!)

(He dedicated that to me, cos you know, tendonitis in my left hand)

That internet one cracked me up

Also cracked me up. I showed it to my boss. He lol-ed.

RIP Big Bird

It's just so strange

:)

(Click on the pic to enlarge if you can't see the words)

Hahahah

This last pic was from me to BIKSS. Cos when I mouthpush his mouth, that's what I feel. 

Moths in my digestive chamber. 

(From Nathan W Pyle's FB page... I love his aliens series!

T-Shirts can be gotten here. )

FFF 2.0 - 11 - the Food, the Period and the Father Edition

I am extremely late with this episode of FFF.

So, Olivia, you're in good company. And yes, it's still FFF on Sunday.

[Roz's Update:]

I have continued walking the stairs at work. From the previous Friday to last Friday I exercised 5 days and have slowly been increasing the amount I do.

I'm sorry to have to leave such un-thought out posts, but you know, father, hospital, me, choir, performances, period, heat, cranky. I'm sure you can work that out.

For the week ending 10th March, here are the numbers :

Average : 11066
Highest in a day : 14, 515
Over 10k days : 5

In links - I've been reading about FODMAP - click this link to find out more, and click here for some low FODMAP foods 

I trust an internet search will get you whatever else you need to know, so for now I shall leave you with pictures of food :) 

Because BIKSS understands that this lidl needs food when she's stressed. He took me out to one of our regular restaurants last Friday for some comfort food (familiar = comfort) and I must say, it was very satisfying. 

classic caesar

mixed grill - half of it anyway, the other half was on my plate

sauteed vegetables which the waitress wanted to take away before we were done eating *hrmph*

And that whole business of spotting and not getting my period? I said to my choir buddy that with my luck it would probably come during a performance. Guess what. 

Yep. So we sang at a gala thing last night and the organisers were nice enough to give us food cos we had two sets, one before and one after the dinner. They saved a couple of tables for us (it was a sit down affair) and halfway thru our meal I had to go to the loo! Thank goodness I had the sense to stick a pad on just in case. 

When I got back I said to her "You know how I said with my luck it would probably come during our performance?" She shook her head and rolled her eyes and shrugged her shoulders all at once and proclaimed "I don't know what you win, but you sure as heck win something!"

"The jinx award, is what" I replied. 

But yes. So I'm feeling a little less bloated now, thankfully, and by the end of this week I should hope that things go back to normal on all fronts.  

On the topic of lady problems, Betty the BFF has also been to see the doc recently who informed her that he BP has shot up to 139 over something. And that's what might have been causing the headaches. Which is also weird for her cos like me, she's one of those 100/60 types. The doc says it could be because of perimenopause. How troublesome this thing is! Argh. I can't wait to be done with it. 

The father should be discharged tomorrow. We've gotten the centre to arrange for someone to wheel him from door to door, since the centre isn't far away from their home. Subject to manpower she said. But if they can't continue the escort the next step would be to go back to the agency and get a homecare assitant come in in the mornings to push the father in his wheelchair. And when I'm done with work I go get him from the centre and wheel him back. 

But let's see what happens. For now, I'm just a bit relieved that we have some sort of plan regarding this business of getting him from one place to another. 

Tuesday Toon #47 - Hospital - Exhausted

My father has been admitted to the hospital for postural hypotension. He fell getting out of or into the lift on Monday morning. I can't quite remember. All I know is mum rang and said she was advised by the eldercare centre folk to take him to the hospital for a check up. And so she actually woke the devil incarnate, I mean, her daughter-in-law up and got her to take dad to the emergency room. 

So I've been to see him on Monday and today, and managed a long-ish consult with the ward doctor. At least she's on the same page when it comes to managing the father's care - at this point, it's about quality of life, and making sure he's pain-free. And really, no one is expecting medicine to prolong his life too much. I had the chance to speak with her without mum or any of the other siblings around, which in a way made it easier for decisions to be made - mainly, take him off the unnecessary drugs and keep only the ones that are going to fulfil those two main objectives. The only drugs we're planning to keep him on are the heart meds and dementia meds. Everything else can go. 

That should make him a little happier - I can't imagine what it must feel like to be presented with a buffet of pills every morning and night. 

The doctor says he might be going home tomorrow... so I'm on standby for escort duty. 

Meanwhile I've cancelled this evening's singing practice cos I'm so exhausted. It's not only the running to and from the hospital for dad, it's also this period that's been threatening to come for 4 days now. I'll spot heavily then it'll disappear. And I'm bloated and feeling hot and uncomfortable all the time,  and the hot dry spell we're having here is NOT helping. 

With my luck, it'll come during one of my performances this upcoming weekend. Oh did I tell you? The choir's singing this weekend! Hurray! I'm so excited. I've collected my choir robe and everything. :)

Right. That's all the news updates - now for the pics of the week ~

I'm glad all they do is save lives. 

I wish I could hang this on a lanyard around my neck.

An oldie but goodie.

Choir peeps had a lot of punning fun with this pic when I sent it to them.

I feel this way too. Only, the mama and papa bears in my family had their roles reversed.

And now I have a hankering for cake.

Fido, play dead!

This is me EVERY morning.

Awkward :)

Ouch. No more role playing for these two!

"Give us a hand, would you?"

As always, let me know which is your favourite in the comments. See you soon!

FFF 2.0 - 10 and How Children Succeed Etc

[Updated]

Welcome to this week's step count update :

Average no of steps per day : 11,069
Highest no of steps a day : 15,456
No of >10k steps days : 4

That's it for today. Let me know if you're writing a post and I'll come back and add your links!

Julie's post is HERE

Olivia's post is HERE

And here's our lovely Roz:

From last Friday to this Friday the only days I didn't do my exercises were last Saturday and Sunday. I'm slowly getting back in the rhythm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This week I managed to steal two afternoons to sit and read while kinda out driving about with BIKSS.

When he went off to see some clients I sat in a cafe and caught up on some reading.

It's a fascinating read. And it got me looking at ACE scores,  The Big Five personality test, and a whole bunch of things. BIKSS was curious too and went off to do some of the tests as well.

For more on what the Big Five Personality Traits are click here.

This is my score:

And what it means

I'm kinda equal parts Analytical Thinker and Logical Mechanic. 

BIKSS' looks very different from mine: 

In order of rank, he got (from highest to lowest):  EI  / AT / PC / LM

EMPATHIC IDEALIST

Uses insight and creativity to help others. Thinks about how the world could be a better and more beautiful place.

ANALYTICAL THINKER

Solves logical problems with rational, complex analysis. Thinks about innovative ways to improve systems.

PRACTICAL CARETAKER

Helps other people in practical, everyday ways. Uses established institutions to maintain stability and security.

LOGICAL MECHANIC

Ensures accuracy and efficiency in logical systems. Uses proven methods to accomplish real-world goals.

Interestingly enough, the one person I'm closest to in the choir I joined some month back shares exactly the same pie chart as BIKSS. I suppose it's not surprise that I like hanging out with her :)

In other news - I've signed up for a free trial voice lesson tomorrow afternoon. Who knows... this may be my new thing.

Tuesday Toon #46

I'm sure that was NOT the desired outcome

On the topic of food...

... and more food :)

I wouldn't want to be in their position

And why not? Mobile pet groomers are a thing now... it's just one step away imo

Poor Dave

Poor whoever-it-is-who's-using-the-toilet

And this is SO me!

As always, thanks to BIKSS for this week's lot of amusing pics. Let me know which is your favourite!