Ditty in my Head

Spank Spank Spank your girl
Till her bum is red
Merrily Merrily Merrily Merrily
Get her ass in bed!

Merry Christmas everybody :)

The Year's Last Meeting

It's very likely that today will be the last meeting for the year for me and BIKSS. The Christmas season is going to be busy for both of us, and then I'm off with the family for a year-end trip. 

He DID make it extremely memorable tho. 

First I got my Christmas present! Birthstone earrings. They're beautiful and meaningful and I love them. 

We ran errands and got home after lunch, and I lay over his lap and he spanked my bum. LOUD RESOUNDING spanks! (Yes, we had the house to ourselves! Yay!) Then of course we hopped into bed. 

After making yet ANOTHER wet spot on the bed, we cuddled up and took a nap together. 

When I woke up I began stroking his cock and his ballsac. And after quite some time he kissed me and said I should be a good girl and go say Hi to Roger. I sidled down on the bed and with both of us laying on our sides I put him in my mouth. And there I stayed for a long long time. 

Hair grabbing - Check. 

like this, but BIKSS was on his side facing me

Face-fucking - Check. 

Leg over my shoulder - Check. 

Making me gag - Check. 

Cumming down my throat - Check.

And after he came, I remained in position like a good little girl and continued to suck on him. Waiting for his usual indication that I should bring my face back up to his so he can kiss me. Er... anytime now Daddy....

Well, it didn't happen. 

What did happen was he left me sucking on a semi-hard cock, licking up the saliva and cum and everything else on him, and when he got bored of it, he flicked aside my bathrobe and twiddled my nipples. And from twiddling he went on to pinching and pulling and twisting and when he got bored with *that* he stuck his foot between my legs and rubbed my pussy. 

And I was STILL sucking on Roger. 

e-v-e-n-t-u-a-l-l-y he motioned for me to leave his cock be and he fucked me. 

And now my pussy is sore, and my nipples are sore, and all he had to say about it was that it'll serve as a good reminder that I belong to him. 

I say that's pretty much a perfect way to end the year!

Just Letting You Know

... that since

I'm going to call a 

timeout and officially declare this blog

I will try and update but no promises k? 

In the meantime, 

And if you're not the Christmas-celebrating sort, 

Walnut Tassies

Not me. BIKSS. Yes he bakes. When he's in the mood. 

He baked some last night, came over this morning at some bloody god-forsaken time in the A.M. bright and early and woke me up to drop off a batch. 

Lucky for him he spent a couple of hours here making up for my early morning wake-up call. I suppose any girl can forgive being woken up too early if she gets a good spanking in return. Speaking of which, he cut it rather close too - the maid had just left the house as he pulled into the car-park. That saved me having to explain my boyfriend being here at 8 in the morning. 

kinda like halfway thru taking a tee off.

And it also saved me having to dampen the sounds leaving my mouth from the nipple tweaking. And from feeling objectified when my shirt was pulled up, but not OFF, leaving my nose and eyes covered while exposing my mouth. 

Which was making "O" shapes like a goldfish while he was sucking on my nipples. And before too long I was rewarded with the smooth, curved surface of Roger's head at my lips. Of course I greedily opened up and took him in my mouth. Perhaps it was more delicious for having my vision and arm movement (above my head) restricted. This use-your-own-tee idea was definitely a turn-on for me.

And yes, he continued to fuck me this way too. I must say it was rather liberating. I'm not sure it's healthy, but it formed a physical visual barrier which in turn helped alleviate the guilt I feel about enjoying a sexual relationship. Hmmm. Perhaps that's why rape fantasies hold such fascination for me - if I am forced into it, it can't be my fault. 

Any thoughts?

The Wet Spot

So it's not always possible to wash the sheets after sex right? 

Besides, I'm the only one who sleeps in that bed. On said sheets. Right?

So last night after zipping into the room and having our quick spank quick sex session, we lay about and talked and giggled for a bit... and sang about elephants having wrinkles. (I blame IKEA.) 

BIKSS started tweaking my nipples. The most silent option on the pain-inflicting spectrum. I got turned on (what else right?) and we had sex again. 

The problem with having sex after already having sex, is that while he's busy pumping into me it's rather inevitable that his load from the earlier session will spill out onto the bed. 

When we were done, we wiped it up and cuddled. 

This morning the maid asked if she could go ahead and tidy up my room. I said yes while still in my pre-coffee stupor.

And then I remembered the wet spot. Or the stain that the wet spot would have left behind. I have never run so quickly in my life. I zoomed in before she could get anywhere near the bed and hurriedly tossed the bed covers over my hurriedly assembled pillows. There was a lot of hurrying about, let me tell you!

But in the end my secret was safe. She did try to stop me from having to make my own bed, "I can do that, you don't have to do it," but I shushed her by changing the subject. LOL.

Having a live-in helper is turning out to be rather tiring, I must say!

AND NOW --- the elephant-wrinkle song!!

It's Oh So Quiet

The maid was out. With the folks. 

We rushed home and showered in record time! 

Then I got my butt spanked. With his hand. Lovely loud rhythmic spanks.

And then it was oh so quiet again. Just in time for her return. 

I'm 40... and sneaking around my own home with my boyfriend having giggly sex trying not to make too much noise. 

Ah, the circle of life. NOT.

Wedgie

You realise I'm on my period? 

And?

And that means my knickers stay on... so if you're going to spank me... you know...

Ever heard of a wedgie?

1001spankingfantasies.tumblr.com

A Recipe Book for Semen

That's right folks. You really CAN buy anything online.

Natural Harvest - A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes

Go have a look at the CWS blog ---> (the pic is the link!)

(It's totally related to today's topic!)



From Smoothies to Desserts, Appetizers to Sauces, these recipes will surely leave you wanting for more! (Although more of *what* I cannot say!)

Here's the write-up from the site:

Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. 

This book hopes to change that. 

Click ON THIS LINK to go to the site. (Yes, the also have the E-book version!)

And here's a smoothie recipe from the book we can all try :

You can all thank BIKSS for finding this amazing item online. I swear he spends too much time surfing.

Busy Days

I've been terribly busy with all the changes going on in my little apartment. The live-in maid has arrived and I'm trying to settle her in. New furniture has been got, things have been moved all over the house, I'm trying to get her official documents sorted, the family is planning an end of year trip so arrangements now have to be made for her inclusion. It's just really noisy in my head, what with all these extra things to think about in addition to regular work and Christmas preparations.

Thankfully BIKSS has been so supportive throughout the week. I usually text quite regularly during the day but that's been missing since the maid arrived. He's left me to do my thing, while still asking regularly if I'm doing ok... 

And he's stayed up late to chat with me even tho by the time I am able to give him any IM time it is usually way past his bedtime. 

Because there'll be someone sleeping in the other room when he comes over now, he's also been thinking about minimising spanking sounds, apparently. 

Last night he announced he was researching the use of bungee cords as a spanking tool. 

I have them lying about at home. 

He knows it. 

We'll be having us some fun tonight I reckon.

Follow Friday the 13th (of Dec 2013)

Bonnie Gets Spanked  - by Clyde, of course! I've just discovered her, and see that many of my friends already follow her posts. But if you're late coming to her party, go have a look at her blog. 

And Happy Friday the 13th! Mwahahahah!

(And on the subject of following blogs and visiting, remember to hop over to the CWS blog tomorrow for Fondles' Friday!)

[EDIT: I've just been to The Power of Surrender. So instead of waiting till next week's FF I decided to add her here - she's got lovely Fantasy Friday pics on her blog every um, well, Friday! She's also on the CWS network so do go over there and take a look at her stuff too!

I've also added ancilla-ksst's A Slave to Master to my blogroll. Her answers to the CWS quiz will be coming up soon on the CWS blog!]

A Cock Worshipping Quiz

First off, have you read dear Faerie's latest post on the CWS blog?

AND NOW...

Here's something fun for you to do this weekend -

1. Does the cock you worship have a name? Would you like to give him one? 

-- Yes. We call him Roger.

2. What's the max number of times you've worshipped cock in a 24 hour period? 

-- Er, in 24 hours, allowing for manipulation of start /end time, I think possibly around 7? 8? Say maybe from 3pm to 3pm the following day.

3. How often does cock-worshipping take place?

-- I see BIKSS twice a week, so twice a week. But anywhere from 1 to 3 times each visit.

4. When worshipping cock, do you start with balls? [Yes / No and elaborate please.]

-- No, I start with Roger, and sometimes hands go to balls, sometimes mouth goes to balls. Sometimes balls get neglected. *Note to self - pay more attention to BIKSS' balls*

5. Do / Can you deep throat?

-- I try. But I gag. So as long as I'm not puking yet, I'll go as long as I can when BIKSS is holding my head and driving the rhythm. Left to me, it's more likely 1 deep plunge out of every 10 regular ones or so.

6. Spit or swallow? (Yeah yeah, I had to right?)

-- Swallow. Always.

7. What do you focus on when worshipping cock? 

-- The feel of Roger in my mouth / BIKSS' reaction / making sure I don't drool all over my own hand and down his shaft to the base of his cock / varying my motions / hands stroking him all over - tummy, thighs, butt, balls / brushing my tits against his inner thigh.

8. How long is a typical cock worshipping session for you?

-- Anywhere from 5 mins to 20 mins I reckon.

9. What is your favourite cock worshipping position?

-- Easy, BIKSS lying down and me between his legs. I'm propped up on my knees and one hand, the other hand is usually fondling him. OR between his legs, crouched and half laying on one of his thighs.

10. If you had to give up oral sex, which would you choose - never giving again, or never getting again?

-- EASIER! I would give up receiving. But I would never survive never giving a blowjob again.

*****************************

[If you'd like to play along, copy and paste the questions and post them on your own blog and the CWS blog too! If you don't have author rights to the CWS blog and would like me to re-post it there, leave a comment after this post and I'll go over and copy / paste your answers for you and include a link back to your blog. Here's your chance to help out in the CWS Revival project!]

*****************************

And just for fun I did  The Legit Can You Give Good Head Test

This is my result: (be warned you'll be asked to create an account before you get to the result page but it's easy enough to get through).

Your result for The Legit Can You Give Good Head Test ...

Blow Job Queen

You blew it with 35 out of 40. The number is pretty meaningless.

Wow. You're good at giving head and you know when to give lousy head when the bastard deserves it. Excellent technique, eager to please... but at a price. You know you're good and you only give good when you get good. Maybe you like it that way. If not, try being a little, you know, looser.

It's Christmastime Alright

We spent the day in the neighbouring town. Shopping-like. And lunch. And he helped me with errands -deliveries, that sorta thing. And after we came back we moved some furniture and dismantled things and finally we were done and could sit down for a breather.

BIKSS said something funny. But it was also meant to tease me.

I laughed.  "Do I deck you now? or deck you later?" I asked.

His reply was a hand for me to hold on to while I was led into the bedroom.

Accompanied by something along the lines of "Maybe I should be the one decking you into the room and spank your bottom."

-Where would you like me? 

-In the middle of the bed.

-Are we going to have sex after you spank me? 

-Do you want to have sex? Hmmm should we?

-I mean, should I take my clothes off?

-Have I ever wanted to spank you with your clothes on? 

-You could have just said Yes, you know. (In my sweetest pouty voice EVER!)

I plopped into the middle of the bed. And he plopped the Christmas paddle on my behind.

It was ouchie, and delicious, and oh how I've missed it!

And then he got on top of me and fucked me and spanked me and stuck his fingers in my mouth and pulled my hair, and pushed my head into the bed. And then he came. And I was spent. And happy.

Baby It's Cold Outside

Have you clicked on the CWS link--->

And now, on to today's not-heavy topic.

I saw an article on oddity central and thought of all my blog friends who are freezing their buns off this winter. Here's a snippet -->

Indoor tents are all the rage in South Korea this winter. Apparently they keep you really warm and save electricity as well. In fact, some tent-users say their heating bill has been reduced by half. While the temperature in rooms gets as low as 19 degrees Celsius, the 40,000 won (US$37) tents are quite cozy at 23 degrees.

Given their multiple benefits, these tents are flying off shelves in South Korea. One tent maker claims to have sold 4 million in just a couple of weeks. Thousands of tents are on back order, and manufacturers are rushing to make more. We don’t know who came up with the ingenious idea, but it looks like almost everyone has caught on.

This winter has been pretty harsh for the South Koreans; they are facing power blackouts and surging energy costs with six of 23 nuclear reactors being shut down. People have been looking for cheaper heating methods that save electricity, and the tent is apparently working wonders for them. Families are sleeping in tents setup within their homes to keep themselves warm. Some of them have placed tents on top of beds for extra warmth.

Have a look at the original article here. Go on, click on it. There are pics too!

And because I'm a Gleek here's my favourite version of the song my post was titled after:

What Then?

I'll be brief. Sometimes I read a blog. I think everythings a-ok. I get to know someone. Then I start to judge. Not them, per se. But the kind of relationship they're in. Sometimes I think they're in a "bad" BDSM place. That it seems the Dom's doing stuff to them that isn't quite "for the sub's good". 

It may just be my own interpretation of the D/s relationship. 

What do you do when you no longer "agree" with the activities a blogger is writing about? I don't mean the extremes of their kink or the specific scenes. I mean the emotion that accompanies each playtime. 

I can handle "He did this this and that to me and I relished it and oh I felt so liberated after. And I hated the thing itself, but I loved being able to submit to Master."

What I can't handle is "I really did not want to and that's not what I signed up for but I'm a sub and I'm HIS sub so I have to no matter how it makes me feel, cos he MUST know best what I like and what I don't and my own opinions don't matter."

One says to me - I'm happy to submit. The other says to me, look at me I'm the perfect doormat. 

Yeah, I'm being bitchy right about now. Can you tell? 

So what then? When your cautionary comments get vetoed and the subs justify their actions/thoughts/feelings etc, saying you don't understand, that they need it, despite it not serving any greater good, do we just quietly close the door, click to a new page, and don't go back there anymore? 

Because it's HARD to go back and keep on reading about how someone isn't seeing the abuse that's there. There is FEAR in their voice. And they don't want to admit it. 

Excuse me if I'm wrong, but if there's one thing BDSM and D/s and DD and TTWD  must have, it's trust. And the one thing it CANNOT have, imho, is fear. How can you say you trust this man with your life when you fear him more?

Free for All

Anna May wrote about her recent date and how she wants to believe there are gentlemen out there. And Aurora wrote about her feelings of shame concerning sex, and both these posts made my brain tingle a little bit so that I just had to write something here about my own experiences. 

Fact - I grew up being taught that sex was bad, masturbation was bad, and all things to do with lust was bad.

I have always been rebellious, adventurous (as long as I had control), and wanting to stand out from the crowd. (Huge ego - what can I say.)

Fact - I have never felt good enough / pretty enough / smart enough / rich enough... blah blah, you name it I felt it. 

Therefore when I realised that I had something that other girls didn't (I'm one of those x-factor, flirty, sensual, dripping with innuendo types) which made the boys drool (not necessarily make them want to marry me, mind you) I took it and I milked it and I used it for all it was worth. 

Enter the confused Fondles. On the one hand sex = no-no. On the other hand, it was the ONE commodity I could use to advance my popularity / "worth".  (Ok, I'm referring to sexuality, not sex per se; I didn't go around sleeping with EVERYbody, despite what *they* tell you - altho I know at least 2 fellas who told others they'd slept with me like it was some sort of conquest!)

Ok, remember the not being good enough? Well, being the sexual person I could be meant that the guys would start hanging around, and the girls would start hanging around. There was a period of time when if you asked my friends to describe me in a word they would all say Bitch. The kind that would go out and be cold as ice and still have boys fawning at her feet. 

On the outside I looked and believed myself to be this modern confident tough cookie. But somewhere inside I was still guilty as hell about using something so "dirty" to validate myself. 

Sex has always been JUST sex. Physical. That's the default status. I was able to draw a line between the act and the emotion. Can I fuck without feeling? Yes. BUT can I also have meaningful sex with the man I love? Yes. Don't ask me how. It's a coping mechanism. 

A consequence of the time I was 12 and molested by a trusted family friend; of the time I was offered a ride home from a childhood friend who tried to rape me; of being "forced" into have sex by my first real boyfriend who promised he wouldn't fuck me till I was ready but did so anyway while we were petting and fooling around. 

I've written this down before, I'm sure, somewhere else on this blog. So I'm sorry if I seem repetitive. My point? Um, I can't remember. But rambling on I will say this - if people start treating you as a "sex-object" often enough, it's hard to fight back. I exploited my sexuality. Used it to get what I wanted. 

And then I met this guy. Before BIKSS and I got together. (I don't know if I've written about him before.) 

Date 1 - he tried to get some hands-on action. I said no. He said sorry. 

Then he asked for date 2 - promised he'd be good, nothing like that going to happen again, yada yada, felt a connection and all that jazz. 

Like Anna May I wanted to believe that he could be a gentleman. That he was sincere. 

Date 2 - he showed up early at my place with dinner. So we ate in. And then he forced himself on me. Martial arts practitioner. Big fella. The joke's on me tho cos I actually thought those traits would be useful if he needed to protect me. Well, the way I saw it, I had two options. Fuck him and tell him to get lost after. Or struggle and risk hurting myself fighting him off. I flicked my "desensitise" switch to "on" and said Fine. Let's fuck. If that's what you want. And then after that you can leave. And I never want to see you again. And even after that speech he was keen on carrying on. Sheesh. What a monster. 

And that left me asking the same question I saw Anna May pose on her post - Am I free for all? Is that all I am? Just because I'm sensual and flirty does that make it automatically ok for guys to expect me to put out? 

I suspect the other reason I could block off my emotions when I was having sex is cos of the guilt. Like Aurora I grew up in a church environment and under NO circumstance were we to enjoy sex, not even with your husband, it was only for the sake of procreation, it was a duty to the marriage, it was our duty to the church, blah blah. It was like brushing your teeth. Something you had to do. Not enjoy. Not indulge in. And no brushing other people's teeth neither. Ok that was a bad analogy. But you get what I mean. 

Where does that leave me then? To be honest, BIKSS and I started out purely physical too. That was my agenda. I knew he liked me, I wanted to have regular sex with someone whom I wouldn't fall for who wouldn't fuck me and leave, I didn't want to engage in sex with strange men anymore. I wanted a regular fuck-buddy whom I didn't have to think too much about in the "trust" department. He was "safe". 

And then he cuddled me, we fell in love, (ok, *I* did... he says he'd already had feelings for me for a while but never admitted it to himself!) and he turned my life inside out and messed with my brain and my emotions, and then I discovered Blogland. And now here I am, with all you lot having to suffer my insanity.

So right now I'm learning to accept that none of it was my fault. I didn't ASK for any of those bad experiences. The guilt is on THEM. 

I'm learning that sex isn't bad. See, I've made a choice that I'm going to enjoy the sexual side of life. And since I've made that choice, then it's up to me to NOT be a hostage to all those years of conditioning. 

I'm learning to be more discerning. Just cos I flirt with someone doesn't mean they're allowed to take advantage of my body. They can jolly well flirt back without being lewd and bawdy and vulgar. And if they can't do that, well, then clearly they are NO match for my superior flirting skills. Pfft. Flirting is an art I tell you -as I'm sure every flirt reading this right now will agree. 

I'm learning to enjoy sex WITH emotion. I'm learning to trust that BIKSS doesn't judge me. I'm learning to believe that I *am* good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, worthy enough. And anyone who doesn't think so can go rot at the bottom of a lake. 

So thank you Aurora and Anna May for writing your posts which nagged at the corners of my soul and inspired me to write mine. 

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And on the topic of reading other people's posts, have you taken a look at the CWS blog recently? I've convinced Spanky to leave it up by committing to a Fondles' Friday weekly insert. If you haven't seen my latest post, GO TAKE A LOOK. I'm trying to keep all content over there original so my readers here won't go there only to see a repeat telecast of what I've already written... and then stop visiting there altogether.

So if you want more of me, or the stuff I babble on about, make the CWS blog a part of your regular read too! Let's get lively, people, and bring the CWS blog back to life. (Was that a shameless plug or was that a shameless plug??)

Sex after a Spanking

[Remember some time ago I said we had a rather "serious" post in the making? Well, this is it. I suppose it might not sound too heavy, but the subject matter isn't exactly frivolous and I'm expecting a lot of people to have opinions on this. Still, it's my blog and I'll write if I want to.... *yes I was singing that*- ok, but not to be rude or anything, this is just OUR collective opinion on the topic. Feel free to comment and discuss.]

My BBFF, the talented and lovely Ms Renee Rose, once wrote a post asking what is everyone's take on the No Sex After Spanking rule. You can read it here.

But of course that meant that it would get me thinking too. Cos that's what I do - think. I remember bits of conversation, then pluck up some courage, organise my thoughts (and watch telly at the same time because I'm just awesome that way!) and then try to put something out here that reflects how I feel without offending too many people.

OK here goes. (Bear with me - The Vampire Diaries is on and I might meander a little.... or a lot.)

FACT: We don't do punishment. We do spanking. I like spanking. I enjoy submitting to him, accepting his pain. He doesn't spank me for the sake of making me hurt. He spanks to allow me a chance to show him my submission. PLUS it centers me - and a calm sub is of a lot more use to him than one who's flying off the handle.

So that's a win-win for everyone so far.

FACT: It's the submission that makes me all hot and bothered. Not the pain per se. Submission from giving him a blowjob, from kneeling and laying my head on his lap, from presenting and waiting for him to do whatever he will with me, from wearing something special for him and anticipating his arrival - all of these turn me on. So for the record, the actual PAIN from the spanking in itself isn't the trigger. [Edit: It's actually a combination of 3 things really - the what - spanking, not just any kind of pain;  the who - delivered by BIKSS, not some random fella; and the why - as a sign of submission, my way of saying do whatever you want to me.]

Now having settled that for everyone here... I can move on to the main part of my post.

The big question on my mind is, well, was : 

Why NOT sex after spanking, specifically in DD relationships?

There are those of you whom I read who are in the DD camp and after a punishment you go on to talk of the awesome sex you have as a confirmation of your reconnection. I smile at these. It makes me happy. It makes me think maybe DD isn't so bad after all. 

(That is, in a third person, I'm-not-myself way of course. There's no way we would be able to pull that off around these parts. It's just not for us. BUT if BIKSS and I were married and lived together, I'm sure at some point if there was an infraction - on my part - and we'd managed to work thru it, there might be a reset spanking - it's happened before. And hold on a tic... I'll get to why "punishment" won't work for me in a minute...)

But some of the DD guides I've read state with no uncertain terms that there is to be absolutely no sex after a spanking. The fear here is that the wife (naughty girls that we all are) might associate her spanking with sex and act out on purpose in order to get that sort of attention from her HoH. These are the reasons I totally disagree with that sentiment-

1) I'm sure she can entice her husband into sleeping with her without having to act out. 

2) No matter how one associates sex with spanking, a punishment spanking probably hurts way worse than the other kinds. And no woman would act out to purposely disappoint her HoH and then earn herself a spanking just so she could have the sex that follows. See point 1).

3) If this were indeed the case, the entire DD relationship is doomed anyway because it means her need for sex is bigger / greater than pleasing her husband. And why aren't they even having sex in the first place that she has to resort to misbehaving? Again, see 1)

4) A punishment is meant to be carried out when both parties are calm and have acknowledged the event that caused it, and the events to follow. It is also supposed to clean the slate. And the aftercare is meant to show a reconnection and offer comfort and serve as a physical gesture of what both persons are feeling at that point - she is sorry, and grateful for his forgiveness, he has forgiven her, and accepted her apology. And if all is reset then why should the intimacy of a sexual union be prohibited? Is that not the purest form of two people becoming one in love and togetherness?

Of course I could be an idealist and totally off the mark.

But here's the part where I tell you why spanking as punishment isn't going to work on me. The main reason is that I think spanking isn't constructive at all. I tend to think that the punishment should fit the crime. Been rude to your HoH? Then perhaps he should have you use the words Please or Thank You in all your sentences for the remainder of the day. It's harder than you think. And it is a constant reminder that being rude is a no-no. 

Shouted the F word at his face? Perhaps you should remain silent for the next 2 hours. It'll give you time to think, that's for sure, about what you've done. 

Forgot to do something? OK, now wait. People forget. How is this even punishable? 

In my book, the only way a spanking is fit punishment is if a wife turned around and farted in her husband's face to prove a point. Then I grant you, a sound spanking would make a good reminder NEVER for her to turn her back (and hiney) on him.

The conclusion? There's something that just doesn't make sense for me about this whole thing. AND I suspect the person who thought up that rule was a guy - and the rule was in fact put in place to prevent the HoH from becoming too paddle-happy. See, it's like this. Guy spanks girl. Guy's turned on. (I don't know many men who wouldn't be... yes, even in vanilla circles!) Couple has sex. Guy associates giving a punishment with sexual gratification. Guy ends up punishing girl for every darn thing. Ta-Da! Right. And now that I have solved the great mystery of WHY the no sex after punishment rule exists, I can sleep better. 

So in the end, I suppose I get that it works for some people, and I wish them all the greatest love and connection with their significant others. But it's just not for me. When I've been a shit and upset BIKSS, or when he's been an ass and behaved badly and hurt me, we called each other on it, said what was pissing us off, gave the other (or forced them to listen) a chance to explain, then came to some sort of conclusion that we BOTH agree on. And at that point our slate is wiped clean. Because it is. Because he says so. And because I trust him. And I believe him. 

And then if a spanking happens it is because we are reaffirming our roles. It tells him I am his. STILL. DESPITE. REGARDLESS. I am his.  AND it tells me he is still my protector, my champion, my person who will stick up for me, whom I can run to whenever, for whatever. 

But it is NOT punishment. 

And right after that, why, we have hot kinky sex... of course!

www.trendolizer.com

Follow Friday 6th December 2013

McKitten's  Pillow Talk is now up for public viewing.

She's been nice enough to add old posts too... and from what I hear, will be updating and uploading more as and when she can.

Death By Balls

It felt like I was going to be suffocated by scrotum.

Last night BIKSS and I got involved in some crazy heavy serious kissing and touching and pinching, and you know, all the usual stuff..

I'm too lazy to write anything erotic but here are the highlights :

• He bit my lip at one point and I yelled OW. Then after he pulled away I looked at him accusingly and said that really hurt. "You'll live", was the reply. Pfft. I suppose if he had said sorry I would have been disappointed. Yay BIKSS!

• He knelt over my face and gave me a mouthful of ball. I wanted cock. Wait. Did he care? Nope. All I got was my nipples pinched and twisted alternately, and lots of ball to suck on. And trust me. Pubes CAN get stuck in one's teeth. It was a first for me too. 

• He decided to turn around (69 anyone?) and stick Roger into my throat while covering my nostrils with said (damp) balls. Really? Oh but they smell good... er... And then he pumped his cock into my throat, while spreading my lips with his fingers and licking on my clit. Hello, BIKSS is a big man. When he's that low over me I have no where to move. Luckily I figured out a way to tilt my head to the side so I could suck on Roger and tongue his shaft WHILE still getting air into my lungs. 

And after that he decided I was worthy of a good fucking. Then I asked him if I could have trusty ol' Captain Silver and had me a quiet not-earth-shattering cum. 

Of course just before he had to leave, I asked him if he would pinch my nipple. You know, since I'm supposed to be forthcoming with my needs and wants by way of slutty requests.... and he obliged. It still hurts today. But the rogering I got from it was well worth it. (And no, that's NOT why I chose to call his equipment Roger. It just felt like a good name at that time.)

At Your Feet

I flit from dining table to kitchen, from room to couch, I'm busy with coming home from the store and you let me. 

You sit at the dining chair and have your fruit. You don't eat enough fruit. I wish you would. No matter, I'll feed you :)

As you watch me I try to hurry about my business. Putting away groceries, slinging the bag up onto its place among the others. I get you some water, and bustle about to be ready for you. 

Will you shower? Here's a towel. I'll put it in the bathroom for you shall I?

You browse thru whatever brochure or magazine your hand can reach. We chat about nothing and everything at the same time. 

When I emerge from the bedroom after putting away my watch, I see you on the chaise. Sitting with your legs over the side. You reach out your hand, arm outstretched, towards me. 

And immediately I know. I come to you and, holding you for support, I kneel between your feet and sit on my own calves. 

In that instant my world calms. Nothing else is important. I settle into your presence and feel your aura enveloping me, stilling my frenzy. 

You hold on to my hand, or stroke my cheek with the back of your fingers. You kiss my forehead as I breathe in your scent; I look up at you as you curl a hand around my throat. 

At your feet I am my strongest, I am visible, I am whole, and I am loved.

Friday Butt-Fire

The thicker of the two is the new one - and I
realise now I haven't anything beside it for
size reference. Oops.

Yup. That's exactly what it is. I blame Ronnie. Well, ok I blame the Blogosphere. After I saw Ronnie's post on Strickly Caned I wrote a comment about how I like the cane so maybe I would put mine out on the bed when BIKSS came over that night. 

Turns out the universe sent him my intention cos after dinner when we popped into a sundry shop he picked up a new cane. All *I* wanted was a pack of 3-in-1 coffee. 

Our old cane is a little worn, I admit, but when I'd asked BIKSS before if I should replace it, he'd always said there was no need. The little "dent" near the holding end was something he could easily avoid and it wouldn't change the impact of its stroke anyway. 

But he decided to get this one because "it has more weight" he said. 

Anyway, to cut a long story short,

this was during / immediately after :

Some rather weak stripes right? NOT

this was 4 hours later :

and this was my butt the next morning!

I'm sorry it's a blur. But you can still see the purple splotches right?

Ladies and gentlemen, my butt cheeks are well and truly bruised. 

They appear to also be rather resilient cos it LOOKS way worse than it feels.

Which brings me to something else we talked about :  I often feel that BIKSS doesn't spank me hard enough, or he's worried that the implement he's using might hurt me and therefore tends to err on the side of caution. Always a good thing, except when dealing with a spanko girlfriend who gets turned on by um, well, getting spanked! 

Now I'm not saying I want to sport a pair of bruised cheeks all the time, but I suspect he can afford to up the intensity a bit. And the reason he doesn't, is cos he's using HIS own pain threshold as a measure of how heavy each smack should be. All well and good and extremely logical (and safe), but considering he has less of a problem with fractured bones than with a teensy smackeroo, I needed to help him understand how much this butt could take. 

Hence the playtime purpling. 

After 2 or 3 slightly more intense strokes (the kind that makes the "whoosh" sound) we realised that what I thought of as "medium" is equivalent to his "I'd be off hunting someone down to kill them" or something equally descriptive.

To his credit I must say he bit the bullet and endured the burden of administering some rather hard strokes (evidenced by the consequent bruising!) and for a rather extended period of time too. 

I wouldn't be surprised if this episode takes him a lot more coming-to-terms with than it would me. Hey I kept up my end of the bargain - he did say I was to make my needs known to him right?

Island Fun (4)

OK so by now you would have gotten the gist of our island fun. Lots of talking, lots of walking, spanking - not so much. 

But after a yummy seafood dinner followed by some Clash of Clans (me) and laptop (him) time at the restaurant where there was wifi (we later realised there was wifi in the chalet too! silly us!) we headed back and along the way was when we had the conversation about how I thought he wasn't Dom enough.

Well, after he said I should "ask" him for a spanking if I felt I needed one, I accused  reminded him respectfully that I DID want this holiday to be a spankfest! 

He said we'd work something out. And when we got back the neighbours were out! OR not. I don't really know. Cos at some point he said it's ok cos they won't know what the smacking sounds are anyway, and the only way they'll know is if they're spankos too!

BIKSS instructed me to strip and present on the bed, and then he went off for a bit. I was beginning to wonder where he'd gone to when I felt this land on my butt!

It HURT! Mind you, it's not the flimsy cardboard type. This was made of solid half-inch thick plastic! With every swing I inched a little bit farther away; I was very tempted to scuttle away altogether. Damn! He tells me often enough : Be careful what you wish for - and I NEVER listen. When he thought I had made enough noise with my OUCHes and OWs and HEYs  he disappeared again and I enjoyed what little respite that break afforded me.

What I felt next seemed to be mild compared with what had gone on before. He had fetched a wooden hanger from the closet. Hrmph, for someone who wasn't all too keen on a heavy spanking session (cos of the neighbours being able to hear) he sure was pulling out all the stops NOW! He didn't see me react to it much, so he chucked it and spanked with his hand while checking with me how it felt (the hanger that is) and after my feedback, he retrieved it and this time he really went to town. Between the hanger and his hand and the plastic door sign thingy, I was a dripping mess down there by the time he decided he'd had enough of warming my backside and was ready to move on to other activities. 

*******************

Despite all his ministrations, however, my bottom bore no signs of any spanking. To remedy that he said he would oblige my request to leave some marks (so I have SOMEthing to show my readers, of course!) and had me turn around for some of his ultra heavy handiwork.

So here you are, readers :)

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ON an unrelated note, if you'd like to have a go at Kenzie's spanko advent calender, go over to her blog and take a look now!